I'm still with my husband and I feel all of that. How could you feel anything else when everything you knew just shattered under your feet. I'm pretty disgusted with mankind right now too, all the cheating that's going on at my husband's work, I can't even watch a bridal show anymore without thinking the man is full of crap. I'm hoping time gets rid of all of these feelings, I do know that I plan on being a little more independent, it looks like you have to be independent. Maybe good things will come of this.

Girl, do you even know how afraid I am right now???

I think FEAR is a perfectly normal emotion, considering what has been done to us. I, like yourself, am just disgusted with the human race right now. And I hate being like this....it's not me. I'm a by-product of greed and lust.

Thanks folks, for fucking us up!

I'm here for ya...

God, when I kicked my ex out I was 50 years old. 50 Fucking years old - and the first time in my LIFE all alone. At first I thought I would just die. But every day I picked something that I was scared about - it didn't have to be a big thing - just something. And then I tried REAL hard to do it. Didn't beat myself up if I didn't, but tried real hard. Pretty soon I was feeling like I could walk on the moon! It was an amazing feeling. I felt strong and beautiful! I have gotten a little lazy lately and am beginning to slump - but I will continue to try.

Oh, I think sometimes people just suck!

As a guy, I take that fear can be used in a constructive way. When you are in fear, you seek to protect yourself.

This is the opportunity for us to recognize that only WE can protect ourselves and our kids....not out spouse who behind our back gave up the most sacred part of our marriage to someone else .....

I deeply believe we can live happily with or without our cheating spouse. It takes time to overcome the fear.

I dont know what happened, but I love overcoming fear. Actually I think I am addicted to it. I sufferred panic attacks 10 years ago, and became fearful of just about everything. I had to face nearly every fear you could imagine. I got so used to it, I came out of it with less fear in my life then when it started.

That being said, I still have fear which presents itself, but I love the challenge of overcoming it.

There will be better days for you. (((hugs)))

Face your giants. They may be easier to tackle than you think.

Optimus...your name should be Optimistic!
haha, okay-that was cheesy :)

I really think you have a good point here. I've never been one to run and hide, and this should be no exception to the rule.

There is no doubt we can rebound from this...we may come out on the other side a bit different than we entered. But different can be good, if you still possess the ability to look at the bright side :)

Crikey i can so realte to this.But,also i fear if we split i will be stupid enough to take him back yet again like i have so many times.

Leaving will be the biggest, most important decision I ever have to make. You can believe that once I do it....it is DONE. I keep telling myself, I don't want to wake up years from now and think, what the hell am I doing here??? I guess in short, I've wasted enough of my time...and enough is PLENTY enough.

I can relate to being fearful. I have stayed with my husband, I did leave him but he came after me and begged me to come back and has done much to prove that he means what he says. But I still fear I am being lied to about waht happened with this excuse for a woman he had his fling with. I have been having nightmares nearly every night, some I don't even remember, just wake up shouting!! But yes, I am too disgusted with people in general and do not look on life and marriage the same way I did before. I feel especially sad when I look at my two little kids and imagine how my H could risk losing them and hurting them so much just so he could have cheap thrills with some cheap bit on the side. As he keeps saying she meant nothing to him at all... My faith in mankind is at an all time low, especially since some bloke I was introduced to found out my husband was a cheater and asked my friend for my number convinced that I would want to get him back. I politely declined saying that some people have no morals but I certainly do. God....some people.

I know what you mean. I feel like I've lost my faith in humanity. I now feel that anyone is capable of anything and nothing surprises me. It's made me become really negative instead of the positive person I used to be. It's depressing to be like this and I hate that I let someone do this to me. It just hurts so much. The fact that my husband would do this and with a married woman no less. It also kills me that so many people knew about it and told me nothing. I hate him for what he's done to me. I hate her too. It's really just the worst thing he could have ever done to me. I just wish I could get the thoughts of the two of them out of my head. I hate it.