mama, he sounds like he's keeping you emotionally hostage. You two did not deal with his A at all and the pain will not go away until you do. I'm going to be blunt; who gives a rat's behind if HE gets mad....YOU should be pissed!

You should go to counseling and process what happened. A good therapist will guide you through all of this turmoil. Silent treatment? He needs to grow up! I have a suspicion that his suicide attempt was a cry for attention. That's another way he's keeping you hostage.

You have to risk ruffling his feathers a bit because you BOTH need to deal with the A. Your children deserve to have their mom back. Deal with this before it's too late and you've missed out on years with your children because you were in a deep depression. We're all here for you.

Thank you so very much for your thoughtful reply. I cried when I read it because this is the first time in 3 years that I felt like I wasn't crazy. You're advice was right on, and I think what I needed to hear. It's like you have been beside me all along. I guess when its you in the mix its harder to see whats so clear. You are right!! Thanks for the kick in the butt that I need!!

Amen what Znzsmom said!

Ditton on ZNZ's reply! And I will add that this is a man who attempted to take his own life---but is not in COUNSELING!? Can we talk 800 lb. gorilla in the room please? He has some serious issues and wants you to live with that gorilla, day in, day out, without a word.
This isn't healthy for you, or him. Please seek counseling to help you start planning a path of recovery- you don't deserve to live like thi and maybe he just needs a professional to help him see how much better life could be if you work together to get rid of that gorilla.

Yes, what Cross said! Mama, I am by your side in spirit. I know that depression that steals you from your children. I'm just now emerging from it. My children did not have their mother for a year and a half; they only had a mess in a mother suit. I went through the motions, took care of their basic needs, but isolated myself most of the time. I lost entirely too much time, precious time, to this. I'm not wasting another day. Please get help and treasure your children. You can do it...you're stronger than you know!

Would you mind giving me some advice on how to begin getting out of this deep depression. I am so worn out, I feel dead inside. I'm so tired,emotionally and physically. I dont know where to start. I isolate now, to the point of even leaving the house. I have no one to talk too. After my husband came back my entire family stopped talking to me. I have just started to learn that I am a severe codependent. My whole life I have been a pleaser. I never create waves for fear someone will be mad at me. My husband always told me I needed to stand up for myself and even if people got mad they wouldnt go away. Well, thats not at all what happened. I thought I needed to give my marriage a try after his A, and now I have lost everything. He treats me like I'm a burden and I'm so alone. My youngest daughter was born with a birth defect 5 years ago, and ever since things have just spun out of control. From fighting ins. agencies for needed surgeries, to raising 4 girls, dealing with serious medical problems myself and his A. It has been nonstop and I want to give up. My children are the only thing that keep me going. But I want so badly to feel something other than pain and saddness. Your replies now are my lifeline. I'm so pathetic!!LOL I used to be the happiest person, and so positive. I always thought the best and now its the opposite. I trust nothing!! I dont want to be like this, I dont even like who I am now.

mama, recognizing these things is the first step. You need to see a therapist and perhaps you need to go on an antidepressant. They take up to 6 weeks to get into your system, so be patient. Since the depression is now inhibiting your daily functioning, medication may be warranted. Please consider this.

You are not alone. We all know your pain here. I'm sorry your family isn't being supportive. I am definitely an advocate of trying to hold a marriage together...until it becomes too toxic. If your H isn't willing to do the work to rebuild, you're in this alone I'm afraid. Only you can decide if it's worth it to keep trying, but try for the right reasons, not because he's emotionally blackmailing you. Stay strong and God bless!