3 years almost to the day as you. I find myself losing this struggle and reaching for the door, actually at the threshold and waitng to walk out. I have tried with everything in me to make this work but the honesty your wife gave you and her facing what she has done has not come from my wife. The only thing I recieved was more lies and denials about her last affair and having to discover a previous one as well. I searched for forgiveness but in the end how do you forgive someone who doesn't want it. What is the price of forgiveness and what is forgiveness worth. forgiveness to me is priceless but to her it is worthless.

I have seen many changes but the one thing that will never change is the fact that my wife never changed who she was our entire relationship, she was just great at hiding it. My eyes are open and I see who stands before me and will never let her pretend to be someone she is not and never has been.

Cole I have read many of your post and it sounds like you are moving on past this horrible nightmare and I applaud you for your effort as well as admiring your wife for helping you get past this. I only wish my wife understood she was not the victim and could take responsibility for her actions. The words are spoken but the meaning means absolutely nothing. My wife has a problem and I can't help her.

What, you are on target. You can't force her to change or want to. Either she takes the bull by the horns or she doesn't. I'm thankful Gabi did. Unfortunately, too many CSs don't do that.

But it is one way to know where you stand with her. Words are cheap. Actions tell us where the heart is.

Oh dont have time to read through now almost time to go but this sounds like something I'll be interested in, there are a lot of new "normal" in life now 2+ years post Dday.