Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I have posted before but here is my recap. Married 23 years 2 kids husband had affair for 3 years said it was over but still saw her as a friend all the while telling me he wasn't for 2 years after affair. He lied many times. I love him but I feel I am stuck. He says he is not seeing her but I don't believe him. Going to therapy which we did before but no good as he was still meeting her. He says he doesn't have hard feelings for anyone. That's why he he remained friends with her. I have asked him to stay away from her and out of the town she lives in but his job takes him there. He won't change jobs as he has been there 25 years. I have no family so staying has been the answer but I am not so sure anymore. He is not a very compassionate man and really never has been. My security has been broken and faith. Trying to make it work but scared it will fail. Don't know if I leave if I will ever find love again or someone that doesn't do something worse like drugs, etc. How do you let go and not think about all the time?
I will observe his progress, talk whenever he wants, ask questions if I need to ask, but it is now all about me and my recovery from this betrayal. If he wants to work on himself and still be a part of this relationship, he can show me the proof.
If him staying friends with her even after you clearly asked him not to is acceptable to you then you are stuck.
If you think he is sucking away you self respect (it seems line he is)
Why stay?
I felt like I was spiraling out of control the more I tried to work on our relationship. I was falling further into depression until I could not take it anymore and just stopped working on us and started to work on me. I stopped trying to make him happy because it was making me more upset. I feel better now that I work only on me and start learning to love myself again.
I was stuck as well and I still have days that I get stuck. However, I do not have as many stuck days because I have the attitude that I don't care sh*t about him anymore and started to care more about me. I also expressed to my husband that it is his responsibility to figure out why he cannot be faithful in a relationship because that is his issue. I made it my issue but never again will I do that. If he does not work on him then it is inevitable that our marriage will not last. I am finally getting to a point in my life that I will be fine with it.
You are more important and you are a wonderful person that deserve to have what you give to others. Work on you and love you!!!
Good luck with everything. It is not easy but it can be done.
You believe you are married but sadly you are alone whether you have a roommate you call your spouse or not, it sounds like he checked out on you years ago and has done nothing to make you feel secure since. It doesn't mean you have to pack your bags and leave immediately it only indicates that you need to start looking at your situation with new perspective and realize just how strong you are and how very long you've been doing all of this all by yourself. From that awareness you will hopefully gain even more of the strength that will be needed to make it further down this path you are already on.
Stay strong and you will find happiness! You just need to look within yourself instead of a man