Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I posted this in another Support group as well, I just wanted as much advice as I can get, reading all of your advice truly makes me feel better.
Here is the background to my story for those who havent read it before :http://www.dailystrength.org/people...
Ive been feeling strong, not feeling much "love" but as I had mentioned I am feeling so much anger and regret in this moment.. I have been praying but then I get these moments of "God, why me, why did you do this to me?".
I have asked him to show me what to do, and I feel that deep down I am waiting for him to come back and apologize and us go back to being happy again. and I get angry when it doesnt happen.
But then I pray and I feel that God is showing me what to do, he wouldnt put him back in my life because he was not worth it.
this man has turned into the Devil. So cruel, so cold, so soulless. I dont understand how I could have been so blind?
when he cheated, I forgave him because I loved him, but he never even made an attempt to make me feel special again. He even had the audacity to say that i am asking for too much attention from him "Duh you idiot - you cheated, how am i suppose to feel ?!"
Yet when I made the mistake of putting my hands on him, i cooked him dinners, gave him massages, wrote letters...things to let him know that I loved him and that i was sorry.
I have blocked any form of contact with him and his family. I am just so sad about his family, not one person in his family has reached out to me, meanwhile while this whole mess was happening my parents reached out to him, making sure he is ok.
I promise I have been trying to stay away from seeing anything that goes on in his life. But today I didnt realize i still had on of his cousins as a friend on Instagram (its like Facebook) and I saw that he commented on a picture of hers.
I was so shocked because during our whole relationship he REFUSED to get an account, said he thought it was stupid. Now all of the sudden he is "single" and I guess has a different outlook.
Now that the dust settling i see how manipulative he was, of course he didnt want an instagram..because that would make him put pictures of us..and ofcourse who ever he was messing with would be able to see it.
what hurt me is that in his profile picture , is him and all I see are girls in bikinis behind him.
I cant believe this is the man I married. I cant believe this is the man I trusted to be my life partner. What happened to him?
I wanted to be married because I loved him, he NEVER loved me and that hurts so much. so much.
I dont know what to do, I just feel like he is enjoying life without and thats painful. As if I meant nothing. I mean nothing, that word alone is so painful.
Please pray for me. I need to the light...I dont know how much longer I can do this.
Posted on 08/20/13, 11:54 pm
Here is the background to my story for those who havent read it before :http://www.dailystrength.org/people...
Ive been feeling strong, not feeling much "love" but as I had mentioned I am feeling so much anger and regret in this moment.. I have been praying but then I get these moments of "God, why me, why did you do this to me?".
I have asked him to show me what to do, and I feel that deep down I am waiting for him to come back and apologize and us go back to being happy again. and I get angry when it doesnt happen.
But then I pray and I feel that God is showing me what to do, he wouldnt put him back in my life because he was not worth it.
this man has turned into the Devil. So cruel, so cold, so soulless. I dont understand how I could have been so blind?
when he cheated, I forgave him because I loved him, but he never even made an attempt to make me feel special again. He even had the audacity to say that i am asking for too much attention from him "Duh you idiot - you cheated, how am i suppose to feel ?!"
Yet when I made the mistake of putting my hands on him, i cooked him dinners, gave him massages, wrote letters...things to let him know that I loved him and that i was sorry.
I have blocked any form of contact with him and his family. I am just so sad about his family, not one person in his family has reached out to me, meanwhile while this whole mess was happening my parents reached out to him, making sure he is ok.
I promise I have been trying to stay away from seeing anything that goes on in his life. But today I didnt realize i still had on of his cousins as a friend on Instagram (its like Facebook) and I saw that he commented on a picture of hers.
I was so shocked because during our whole relationship he REFUSED to get an account, said he thought it was stupid. Now all of the sudden he is "single" and I guess has a different outlook.
Now that the dust settling i see how manipulative he was, of course he didnt want an instagram..because that would make him put pictures of us..and ofcourse who ever he was messing with would be able to see it.
what hurt me is that in his profile picture , is him and all I see are girls in bikinis behind him.
I cant believe this is the man I married. I cant believe this is the man I trusted to be my life partner. What happened to him?
I wanted to be married because I loved him, he NEVER loved me and that hurts so much. so much.
I dont know what to do, I just feel like he is enjoying life without and thats painful. As if I meant nothing. I mean nothing, that word alone is so painful.
Please pray for me. I need to the light...I dont know how much longer I can do this.
Posted on 08/20/13, 11:54 pm
I don't know if this is a spiritual question or asking for advice, but here's my take on it-
God may be putting this jerk back into your life so you can FINALLY see that this man is horrible!!! You need to move on and discover why your self esteem is that low that you feel you deserve this crappy treatment.
Remember, God always answers your prayers, but sometimes the answer is, "No!" So if you've been praying for your husband to come back or get better, God may be wanting you to learn a lesson. And that lesson is to be alone. Get closer to God. Work on yourself. But the sooner you clear out ALL TRACES of this man's abuse, the sooner you will begin to feel like a whole person who does NOT need this Devil Man.
Overall it just hurts to know that this mans happiness is NOT being with me, while to me, his absence caused so much pain, not because I love him, but because of his betrayal.
you've made some smart moves ,be proud of that. its healthy.
Please remember, your heart was right.
Just because he didnt treat you/your relationship with the care it deserved doesnt mean your value is any less, because of what he did.Thats on him.It is an indicator of his character defects and lack of some things.
Its not a gauge of your worth.
But don't confuse issues and think that "He" wants your to have this horrible person in your life.
After all, there's also cancer, natural disasters, etc...
Try to stay strong and realize that this does not have to define your life, but it is an opportunity for growth.
Seek out wisdom in books, including your religious text, and support groups and I think you'll find peace.
Take care.
Deliannem: I know GOd has a better plan for me. I just have to get past this painful situation, I want to see what he has in store for me :)
You will come through this for the better if you continue group, sharing, educating yourself on these issues.I never would have guessed I would feel/see things healthier as I do now.I am still growing, and i feel good that it is healthier.Pain doesnt have to mean RUN anymore.Neither does grief, even though i would have if i couldve avoided it.But now I see this was good for me.And I didnt have to do it alone.I reached out to good people on here and GOD helped me even when i didnt have faith to beleive HE was going to.