Infertility Support Group

In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.

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theletter12 04/27/2008

I am becoming so depressed. I've posted before about everyone around me being pregnant or having a baby already. It is so hard to deal with. I'm in counseling and now I'm even comtemplating a group counseling as well. I don't want to be around any of these people. I don't like seeing them it is so upsetting to me. My brother's (who is 4 years younger than me) girlfriend is pregnant and I have not seen them since the announcement. I was supposed to go to dinner with them tonight but I canceled. I can't deal with their excitement while I am dying inside. I also dread any questions they might ask about us having children. I only have my dad and brother, my mother passed away 5 years ago, and I have not told my brother or dad about our unexplained infertility because I feel they will not understand or even try to be understanding. I've contemplated telling them so they might be sensitive but have told my husbands family (3 sisters and MIL) and that has turned into a very hurtful situation. No one in his family is sympathetic to what I am going through...they think its nothing. So I feel I need to keep my "dirty little secret" close to my breaking heart.

deleted_user 04/27/2008

My heart goes out to you. I know what you mean by not wanting to be around pregnant people. My sister in law just had her first baby and now I found out my brother and his wife are pregnant for number 2. They have gotten pregnant, had a baby, and now are pregnant for number 2 all within the time that I've been trying. It is so hard. Sometimes I feel so evil for not wanting to be around them. I think this is very normal. I started taking an antidepressant and I think it's helped.

deleted_user 04/27/2008

I am so sorry. I understand your feelings and you are not alone. We are all here for you. You need to take care of yourself first. If you feel you are not able to be around them right now, then that is the way it is.

You are right, telling them may help them understand your distance. Listen to your heart and let it guide you.

You are in my thoughts and prayers.

deleted_user 04/27/2008

i am very sorry for what you are going through. ive been there. everyone and their grannys getting pregnant, having kids and then having more, while im stuck trying. eventually,i got pregnant, unfortunately my baby passed away. not only was i devastated for the loss of my baby, but remembering what i went through to have her, in addition to knowing what i will have to go through to have more. it sucks, i know. but you should realize... god has plans for us. because it is so hard for us to concieve, just imagine what awesome parents we will be to those precious babies. know you are in my prayers and can talk to me anytime about how you feel. up until today, no one really knows about my infertility issues, but i hated when people would ask me when i was going to have children.

take care and hugs

deleted_user 04/27/2008

Hey there, well I have been having the exact same feelings the past 6 months. We found out my sister in law is going to have a baby. I was devasted . I had so much anger towards her. I refused to talk to her, see her. But lately my feelings have changed. Remember, it is not the baby's fault. So whenever I was having a bad thought I tried so hard to think positive. Find the good in life. My husband and I are stopping all treatments for now. It is too much. So we are going to have fun with each other. Don't get me wrong it is still very hard. but life is too short. I finally got too exhausted to keep going with the treatments. Look at what you have around you and focus on that. Good Luck I hope I helped a little. It will get better. YOu just have to fight through those evil thoughts.

deleted_user 04/29/2008

i just choked reading this i know actually what you mean, all my friends and family have 2 or 3 children each now, and ive broke down everytime ive been told about their pregnancy, i feel like someone has kicked me in my stomach and i grieve as though i have lost a loved one,no one around me understands, i just pray one day i wont feel like this anymore,

deleted_user 04/29/2008

I know how you feel. Everyone around me is pregnant too and it's a horrible feeling inside. You want to be happy for them, but there's something inside of you telling you that you should also be telling the world that you're expecting. I know God has a plan for all of us and I pray that our blessings come soon. Hang in there. We're here for you.

deleted_user 04/29/2008

The Letter, you are not alone! We too have to keep our situation to ourselves. All of our friends have kids, all our siblings have kids, we live in a small town were EVERYONE had kids. My mom passed away 8 years ago so I can totally realate to you there. I haven't told my dad or brothers because I don't think they'd get it. I did tell the MIL but like your situation that TOTALLY back fired. So we don't talk with her about it anymore.

I am very sorry you are going through this. Just know that we are here for you and we understand what your going through. And do what is best for YOU!

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