I know exactly how you are feeling and there is no "one answer" for me to offer. Every day is different it seems and with that comes the need for several different coping skills. I think one of the most important things to do is to allow yourself to go "through" the feelings. I know it is hard because it is not always "appropriate" to cry at your desk or when you are sitting in a restaurant, etc. but my point is that these feelings won't go away. For me, on a good day, IF is still a part of me and the void of having a child is just as real as every other day. I am just able to cope with it better. On a bad day, forget it, I cry and get angry and hurt so much.

One of the books I read about IF and how to cope with it, "Unsung Lullabies" really helped me put some of what I feel in perspective. It did not take the pain away but helped me look at it for what it is. Right from the start IF is a loss, the loss of a dream unfolding the way you always thought it would, having a child the "natural" way with your spouse by making love with no medications involved. Then as your IF journey continues, so do your losses. Being able to look at IF that way and grieve my losses has helped. If you have not read that book, I highly recommend it.

As with grieving with many other things, IF is not something you forget about or get over, it is something you go through and come to some sort of terms with. It will change as your journey changes and you may need to revisit feelings you thought were behind you but come up again in a different way for a different reason.

I am sorry you have to go through this, but please know you are not alone.

You are definitely not alone. It is so hard not having any control over your future.It is hard just to pretend everthing is ok.I guess i'm the wrong person to give advice on this.When i try to block out my IF and get back to living hopeful and focus on my career or even try to get passion back for it i feel as though i'm giving up my dream:( So i'm with you on this one .... don't know what to do!The ONLY thing that keeps me positive about my fertility is i feel in my heart i will have childern.I guess one way or another i will do everything i can in my power to make it happen. I know you will Too!

Infertility is not for sissys. (Quote from Judylyn's mom) It is TRUE!!!So lets feel proud about that... we are all strong women to go through everything we do!

Stay positive you are doing everthing you can and good things wiil come!:)

I am so sorry you are... in the constant struggle. It just isn't natural, it is not how life is suppose to happen. Your right to say it feels like constant crisis! I have often tried to explain this hellish ride. Like a roller coaster we just can't get off of. It is a constant 2wk up & down... 2wks to ovulation... 2wks to wait... See even if you are not exactly 2wks but 3 or 6 or what ever. It is the constant state of stress, anxiety, hopefulness, devastation. The ride continues up & down... up & down...up & down...up & down...up & down... DIZZY YET? up & down...up & down...up & down...up & down... PHYSICALLY ILL? up & down...up & down...up & down... EMOTIONALLY DISTRAUGHT? up & down...up & down...up & down...up & down...ABSOLUTELY INSANE!!!
We, suffering with IF, are like soldiers in battle, in a constant state of alert & anticipation of danger. This is a documented stress discussed for professionals like firefighters who have to be in constant 'ready' mode, the instant rush of adrenaline & the stress of anticipatory 'trauma.' Its is like we don't even get to the PTSD diagnosis because the trauma continues...
SO, of course you "FEEL" in crisis in many ways you are!

But, as Lioness put it so well, it is OK to feel it. In what every way feels right for you... in small doses or all at once... this is a process that will change, so what works one day may not the next... but what ever you feel is OK!!!
And more there are many women here who truly understand the constant chaos of the crisis you feel!