Infertility Support Group

In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.

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Violet15 01/26/2008

well, here I am night before egg retrieval and each day DH has gotten testier with me. Tonight, the night I am supposed to stay calm he got all testy that I had not gotten the right type of chicken for his dinner. Normally I would have just ignored it but with estrogen exceeding 3300 i flipped and threw the chicken across the room. I had come home and he was paying bills- which always stresses him out and I wonder why does he always do this- right before IVF. It is so hard as men process so differently then we do. They have such a hard time sharing their feelings and mine has a hard time nurturing at the times when I actually need it. Now he is reading work papers. I just need to take a deep breath and accept that I get so many other things from him-just not this. Any one have any thoughts?

deleted_user 01/26/2008

Hey, I just sent you a message. Hang in there Hun!!

deleted_user 01/26/2008

i am sorry it is so hard on all of us. Even the guys. I walked in on my hubby talking to my Dr. yesterday and he had tears running down his face. He had been telling him how hard it was since he felt so helpless and how much he wanted to fix everything for me. I didn't even know he felt that bad or was so emotional. They are a different creature that's for sure. Sometimes when things are getting tense it is because he is going through stuff that i don't realize. Nontheless when I really need him I just tell him Hey i know it's tough right now but i need you. Let's sit on the couch and snuggle. it seems to pull him right out of whatever he is thinking. And he steps right up to the plate. Try telling him when it's crunch time that you just need him. Good luck with that.

deleted_user 01/26/2008

I love the flying chicken. I locked my DH in the garage once during stims when he made me mad! He was taking out the garbage! I think that they process so differently with all their emotions and they don't express how they really feel. And now he will remember never to say anything about his chicken again.

deleted_user 01/26/2008

Oh I missed the flying chicken part. That's great. LOL I guess he will think twice before complains about his chicken again. I have to admit I snapped one day not at my DH but just everything and I actually yanked the closet door right off the hinges. Isn't that nice. My husband walked on eggshell for a week and he didn't even do anything wrong. Those drugs can work a number on us.

deleted_user 01/26/2008

That is great about the chicken! I could so see myself doing that!. I have already told DH that when we start the IVF process no matter what he cannot snap at me or make me mad. I know it is hard for them to and that they are going through this emotionally as well but they also have to relaize that they are not going through this physically like we are. They are not the ones taking the meds, having the side effects that go along with the meds, having blood drawn ever ten seconds and someone up in your business every day. These things take a heavy toll and they need to realize that we are not going to be ourselves during these times. Good luck with your ER today!! And maybe strear clear of chicken! lol!

deleted_user 01/26/2008

I am sorry Dh is being moody with you... I know men do get stress with IF too,because they like to control thing and make it better and it makes them feel bad when they see us worried- altest w/ my dh.
Good luck w/ you egg retrival. I'll be praying for you.
God Bless

deleted_user 01/26/2008

I think sometimes I forget that IF affects my DH, too. I always think that I'm the only one who gets upset about it.

But the good thing is, you both want a baby and are both working hard to make that happen. The testiness is just a sign of stress... it shows that he really does care about getting PG, too. I wish you the best! (And maybe serve ham from now on? Tee-hee...:)

Violet15 01/27/2008

you women are all sooo great!!! Even my DH and I are laughing about it now!!xxxxLoved all the stories

deleted_user 01/27/2008

Sorry to hear about your DH and having a bad night. Tonight DH and I went to church and it was about money and greed. Just turn it over to god's hands. I stress about money all the time and DH get's upset. But after tonight I'm going to start letting god take over. I hope things get better!! HUGS

deleted_user 01/27/2008

I threw a slipper while I was on my stims and just missed my DH (I wear a size 10 so it could have been deadly!) I think men just process different. My DH was weird at first and finally told me he felt helpless and it killed him

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