yes the feelings that you are having are completly normal I have asked myself so many questions over the years I couldnt even count I have feelings like that about the IVF route myself its not even an option for me You are just trying to figure what it is you want to do

Who hasn't had all those thoughts go through their head? That is one (of the many, unfortunately) of the crappy things about IF. It makes you question EVERYTHING (Am I ready to be a mom?, Will I make a good mom?, How far am I willing to go to have a child?, is IVF a goo d step for me?, Why am I having to think about all this, when other people can just get pregnant and not have to think about any of this crap?).

I think it's great that you are taking a break and going to talk to your RE about all of your options. Take the time off to sift through your mind what you want to do. Somedays you might think one thing is the next step, the next day, you night be thinking about another route. And that is perfectly ok. You are doing the right thing. It sounds like you know you (and your body) need a break.

Take the summer and rejuvinate your mind and body.

I have had the same feelings. Wondering now since we have been TTC for 4 yrs now if this is what I really want. I love the freedom that we have now espically since we are taking a break from IF and not having to worry about anything! I think it's healthy though to explore and ponder all what if's and be able to work these out in your head. DH and I just try to keep the faith that God will give us a child when we are supposed to have one. Which is fine but I just wish sometimes I knew for sure it would happen. I pray that everything works out for you and you find what truely makes you happy no matter what it may be!

You are VERY normal. There is nothing strange about what you are thinking at all. I have wanted to me a Mother as long as I can remember. But, after years of other health issues and then dealing with all the IF stuff there have been moments I questioned it. Deep in my heart I know I do so we keep going. DF is older then me. He wanted children but was at an age where he thought it just might not happen. Then we met and he realized it could still happen.

My point is that it is up to you and DH what you do. If you decide right now that you don't want to move forward then that is fine. If 5 years from now you change your mind then you can deal with it then.

Should you ultimately decide you don't want children then that is fine too. Or if you want to adopt and not go through all of the IF treatments, again that is fine. One of my best friends does not want to have children and she is great with kids. That is her choice and I respect it. What is good for one is not good for every one.

Take some time to think about it. Talk with DH about how he feels. Listen to your heart and go from there. I am sure you will do what it right for you. I wish you the very best of luck what ever you choose. But please don't think there is anything wrong with you for thinking or feeling what you do.

I'm very much in the same boat right now. In fact, DH and I just had a "discussion" about where we are at and where we want to be. So much of this is about just moving on to get our lives back, but at the same time we know we want to be parents. Not that we haven't thought about being childless. We're trying to decide if IVF is right for us or if adoption might be better. It's so hard and so emotional. And I'm so sorry you are going through a similar experience. It's like I don't want this to be the end of the road (b/c I never thought we would get to this point in IF) but at the same time, we as a couple feel we need to move on for our sanity.

There are a couple of groups out there that I'm part of including the On a Break! which isn't super active, but there are a lot of great gals on there offering support. I also responded to your post about the adoption group.

Good luck!

I'm worry-wart too so you are in GOOD COMPANY. My DH is very patient and he has just loved me through all these IF difficulties. But he always reminds me of this little phrase and it helps me sometimes...

Let the DH worry about the money
Let the Dr's worry about the medical stuff
Let God worry about the world...
and YOU just worry about BEING RELAXED AND HAPPY

Maybe that will help you now too. It's hard iwth IF cause it's so constant. In fact you can read my Journal from TODAY and hear my own worry rant.....

I agree w/pp. Maybe taking a little time off will allow you to clear your head of all of these things that can obstruct what it is that you really want.

You have to go about it however you feel most comfortable... treatments, that is. I know when I first started out I had very strong feelings about IVF .. that it was too much manipulation, too much interferring with nature, etc. And now I just think that if we (as humans) have been given the ability to obtain enough knowledge about reproduction to be able to help people have perfectly healthy babies using means other than the old fashioned way, why not take advantage of it? But, it is a matter of your own comfort level. It is all so very personal.

Also, I think that all of these things that are going through your head are completely normal. My sweet friend from Japan once said to me, "It is a natural dream to want a child." It just sucks that some of us have to work so hard for it.

I hope you and your DH can realize your dream, whatever you discover that to be.

From one worrier to another, you are completely normal. I am on a break for this month and I swear it is making me obsess more. It seems the more you think about it the more there is to think about. Once you can get a little perspective your head will know what is in your heart. Talking to your RE is a great idea.

I ask myself those same questions. A lot. This month is our final attempt at reproducing for the year. I mean, we won't start preventing (hubby won't go there) but we certainly won't be "trying." I need this break. Because right now, I keep asking myself if it's worth it - and I keep not knowing. I keep asking myself if I am ready - and I'm not - but who is? Just lots of things like that. So no, you're not alone. No, none of us can answer your questions for you. And none of us have the magic solution to be able to handle this. But we all understand, at least as much as one person can understand another.

Thank you everyone for your support... it means so much to me!

Darling you are just feeling NORMAL. I think when IF gets to overrun your life you start to think is all of this worth it. The answer will work itself out to you in due time.

I would say you are feeling completely normal. Even when DH and I had decided to go through with IVF I still questioned myself, actually I still am even though I've started the process.

I say take all the time you need and just spend some time this summer relaxing! I think you'll know when your ready to begin again.

I was feeling this way a few days ago. It is completely normal. Take the time off and enjoy yourself. We are now looking into adoption because it costs the same as IVF, however you are almost guarnteed to be a parent. I met a lovely person on Monday at my doctors office during cycle monitoring hours. She TTC for 7 years and lost 3 babies and finally last year delivered a healthy child. She told me never to give up because it is worth it. She gave me some hope at a point when I was feeling low. Just know it is worth it because you are worth it!