Infertility Support Group
In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.
Hello, my name is Daysi. I finally decided to join the support group for people dealing with infertility. I have attached my full story on my profile, and as I was writing it down I could not believe the amount of distress I have put myself into. This infertility journey has shaped me in ways that at times I cannot recognize me. I am getting ready to start IVF #2 and have found myself dealing with lots of different emotions, most of them include being uncertain, confused, lost, sad, not motivated. In a way I feel that this has affected the way I feel at work. I am a perioperative nurse, and recently decided to change jobs because I couldn't deal with the negativity of people I worked with. I really enjoyed my work there but could not deal with the people any more. I changed jobs and now I feel completely overwhelmed. I forgot that the process of starting a new job would be just as stressful. The place where I went requires a lot more, for example I now have to be on call for 24 hours every other weekend. The intensity of work is much higher but the people there have been very supportive. I have thought many times that I want to quit, and go back to an environment that is less stressful. Almost every day I dread going to work. I feel anxious and nervous, at the same time, I have been dealing with the fear of starting this second IVF cycle, I don't know how I'm going to manage everything. I have had an overwhelming urge to move from Chicago to Austin where most of my family is. I find comfort when I search for jobs in the Austin area, and look for apartments in that area, but I can't really make any decisions because I'm already in the process for IVF, I'm also finishing in May the RN-BSN program at the University, my insurance is also covering part of the IVF costs. I feel tided down. I feel like I have no control over anything. I hate the feeling of quiting a job that I just started. I don't know that to do. Any advice is highly appreciated.
My work stress story is backwards from you. I've stayed at a job that I am not very happy at because of all of the IF stress. My job is very flexible with my hours and I know the job inside and out, so it makes it easy to still get the job done even on days when I am not feeling very well or have drs. appts or when my anxiety is out of control and I cannot concentrate. The trade-off for that has been not advancing at all in my career and not making as much money as I should be- I am fairly certain that if I do finally get pregnant, I will not be able to afford this child at all. I guess what I am trying to say is, don't be too hard on yourself about your decision to start a new job, because honestly, any situation you are in right now is going to heighten your stress level bc of the IF. Just trust that you were making the best decision for yourself at the time and go with it. And remember that nothing is permanent. As fast as you found this job, you could find another. It does seem like it is the best idea for you to stay in Chicago right now, especially if that is where your insurance is covering your treatment. Maybe you could start looking at a long term plan though to get to Austin once you have completed the things you need to complete in Chicago. Coming up with a plan to move there eventually might help ease you mind to know that even though you aren't there with your family right now, you are working toward getting there.
I definitely understand just how overwhelming all of this is- I have made many mountains out of mole hills during this process. It is amazing how my brain can twist one piece of information that has nothing to do with dying, and turn it in to "Omg, I'm dying..." I just try my very best to take it day by day and try to stay as calm as I can. It is hard to give up control, but that is what I am learning to do, bc there is little that I can control with IF. One day it will get better for us and we will find peace with wherever we end up on this journey...
Ive been planning to start a cycle at the beginning of February it was my chance to move on with donor eggs.. However, the cycle clashed with an important work trip to the UK. I've got a new boss and didn't know how he would take it if I told him the truth. I was trying to decide what to do... come up with an elaborate lie or just tell him the truth. So I asked people and got the following:
Is there any way you can work your treatment around the work trip? At what stage of treatment will you be and how long are you going for? For example if you were doing down reg you would be fine to still travel. However, if you will be doing stims it way be more difficult due to scans, or equally problematic if you are going to be travelling after transfer. A lot of it also depends on the type of treatment you are having: e.g.If you are doing long protocol you will be able to down reg a few weeks longer.
Regarding telling/not telling, it's a difficult one: having people know your private circumstances can be hard, but then making up cover stories is equally hard. In this respect I would always suggest using the classic "gynaecological procedure" excuse (which clinics and GPs will often cite in sick notes). After all, it is a gynie procedure and if you don't feel you can work through it you shouldn't have too: everyone has different situations and circumstances and responds differently so you should do what's best for you.
This reply has completely made my mind: there is nothing more to life than going straight to your aim. No work, no job, no travelling troubles might take your chance away!!
If people around you are understanding and supportive theyll just help you. If not quite them and go further. May God bless you on your way, dear Xxx