my neighbor is a crazy partyer and was pregnant (on accident of course) when I was pregnant. I miscarried, and she now has a one year old daughter. Well she promptly tells me last week that she's (surprise again) expecting number TWO...and, here is the real kicker, she tells me this as she stands there with a cigarette in her hand.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

OMG yes!!! my brother and his wife tell me all about how my niece and nephew get into everything.... it's rediculous! same situation as your neighbor. it's not just the usual kid mischief, it's MAJOR stuff the kids should never have been able to get to! soooooo frustrating...

My sister, don't get me wrong I love her, but she has 2 kids. My nephew is 3 and she had him at 18 and my mom now has custody of him. She sees him about 15-20 every day or whenever it is convenient for her. She now has a 2 week old little girl. Who knows about this child, she is married to the dad but no one knows what the future holds when the new weres off. Both of hers were accidents. Plus I work at wal-mart pharmacy and see people mistreat their kids all the time. I wish I could just go out there and slap their faces!

oh yeah everyday I live with my BIL and SIL and they have two children 1 5yr old and 1 9 month old and My BIL ignores them sometimes and SIL cusses at the oldest all the time I get frustrated and wonder why they have two and Im still stuck you are not alone

When I see teenagers with babies, and they treat them like a doll. The boys don't even have the pants on right. I like to give them a belt. I ask God why them?

I am a therapist and work with children. I get into these situations often. IF is really taking it's toll on me lately. Normally I handle the VERY poor parenting skills I encounter pretty well. I swear if I meet with one more lady who gave birth to her fourth crack/meth/herione addicted baby with the fourth diffrent father, neglecting and abusing this blessing, I am going to scream! Yet I plug away and try to help these families (or children who have been removed) over come this.

Sometimes you just have to acknowlegde this isn't fair. People who would cherish the blessing of a child have to work so hard for it, while thoes who should NEVER have children multiply away.

I am so sorry. Yes, I went through it with my old best friend. It was not the only reason our friendship disolved after many years, but played a good role in it. I still care for her and her child very much and we talk from time to time, but I just got to a point where I could not have certain behavior in my daily life. If she ever needed me or was in trouble I would help her in a minute. But it became an unhealthy situation for me. There was a lot she took for granted with her child and towards the end of our friendship when she lived with me it just got too out of control. I never wanted to step on her toes but after a certain point I had to call her on her behavior, for her childs well being.

Anyways, I wish you the best of luck with your friend and just wanted you to know you are not alone.

Oh yes, I have a friend who used to do that to me. She has 3 kids from her first marriage, all by accident, and is now pregnant w/ her 4th, another accident, with her new husband. She curses at them (f-bombs and all) screams at anything, etc. Her kids are actually very good. I'd be the first to say it if they were little brats, but they absolutely are not. I would always tell her that her kids are going to grow up and hate her.

She always used to say to me when her kids would aggravate her, which was all the time, "don't do it, Dee, don't have any kids", "just have one", "you have no idea what you're in for", "if I ever get pregnant again, I'll drink acid or have it sucked right out of me". That's the shit she used to say when I was TTC 5 years ago with my daughter. I never said anything (and don't know why). My Mother always says that "sometimes the best response is no response" I guess so that the people are left in uncomfortable silence after their words, regardless of the situation. Then, my friend had nerve to tell another friend of mine how "neurotic" I was about the trying to get pregnant thing. However this other friend knew what an ass the first friend was. I never shared any details with her then about TTC, and certainly don't now. She knew the subject was off limits to me, so she just thought I couldn't handle talking about it to her. When she absolutely had no idea, even to this day, how much I resent her for it. But, as I've always said in my old age and infinite wisdom, the situation will present itself, and I will have the opportunity to make my point. And you better believe that I won't let it slide.

Wow!! I would be so pissed!!! My DH has a 12year old daughter. She's wonderful!!! Her mom, not so much. And now her mom is pregnant with baby #3 and dad #3!! her 14year old was on the pill with mulitple partners, drinking and smoking! Mom says what a hard time she has raising 2 on her own even though both dads and families help her ALL the time!!! She claims she has no time or money to get her older daughter involved in activities. But since when does going for walks, or to a play ground, or playing ball, cost money???? Or going to the library to read together!!! Their mom comes home, eats and spent all her time on the internet searching for a "man"!!! Found a sucker, married with months without even considering her children (and he left 4 behind in another state over a 1000 miles away!!!! flies them over 2x a year atleast). Atleast my step daughter has her dad and myself to expose her to all the possibilities life has to offer her, and help her reach her full potential! I just won't let myself be around people like your "friend" She sounds like she's only interested in having babies and not being a "parent". Really, anyone can have a baby, not everyone knows how to be a parent!!!! Stay away from her!!

hey when I read your question it reminded me of a post I made earlier on another support group so I just copied and pasted it here (sorry I am lazy today) It will tick you off too.......

I work with this girl that is pregnant I'll call her AMY.....I work 2nd and she works 3rd so she is my releif and I cant avoid her....I have to pass on what happened on my shift and all.....I wish I could leave 20 mins before my shift ended so I could avoid her....she makes comments that HURT all the time I really dont think she cares....some have said maybe she dont realize how hurtful the things she says is but how can anyone be so heart less???? examples......she knows we are trying to have another baby and she comes in once a week and says "are you pregnant yet"? when I reply no she says "you dont know what you are doing it is easy and rubs her stomach"....duh I had tubal reversal surgery that dont mean I will 100% become pregnant......she made a comment about a male coworker that had a bad string of bad luck for a month or so ( heart problems...wife had surgery to have leg amputated because of diabetis....hand almost cut off with table saw working on his deck) she commented he must have been really "BAD" and GOD was punishng him by the bad things happening to him...so I asked her did she think that is why Josh died because we were being "punished" and she said YES......GGRRRRRRRR!!!!!so Friday night she came in and was venting about an argument her and her hubby had before work....so I was listening ...no big deal..right ? WRONG!!!!!! she goes on to say that they were talking about baby names and she has said from the beginning she didnt care he could name the baby....well his dad was in very critical condition a week or so back and they called the family in to see him....."STEVE" her hubby told his dad "If you pull through this you will get to hold your granddaughter "RUTHIE" (Ruthie was the name that Steves dad alsways wanted to name a daughter IF he ever had one after his grandmother but he had 3 boys)so Steve thought this 'might' help his dad pull through....aparently it did because his dad is out of ICU and doing well.....so Steve told Amy what he said and that his dad even mentioned it when he woke up that he remembered someone telling him about his grand daughter RUTHIE ...she was pissed she dont want her daughter named this...so she told him " why did you let me get this far (she is due in Oct) in this pregnancy....I was happy with my 2 girls and didnt want this one but you did....now you have let me get to far along to ABORT this little BITCH so now I am stuck raising your kid and I will be damned if you name her Ruthie.....I know I should have aborted her when I had the chance".........WTF I stood there with my mouth hanging open and couldn't believe what I had just heard.....I cried on the way home thinking about that poor baby.......

and then I got to thinking about all of us here that has lost a baby to SIDS or whatever means and we loved our babies and would have laid down our lives for them ....but she is blessed with a miracle and dont appriciate it one bit.......I just broke my heart.....

I remembered something else she said when she was 3-4 months along and had been doing ALOT of heavy lifting and started bleeding and I asked her why wasnt she at home ...did she call her Dr and what did he say?? she said he told her to be on bed rest and come in Monday to see him and she said Maybe I will miscarry this weekend and I wont have to go in!!!!!!!!

there has been other remarks too that just hurt ....but I will spare you guys.....I am surprised if anyone is still reading this...sorry so long but I just had to get it off my chest and VENT about it....thanks for reading.......
Posted on 09/02/08, 06:09 am

I soooo understand you! My BF suddenly decided to stop the pills one day and "see what happens". She an ex-drug addict, a heavy smoker and she above 35. And just two weeks later, she's pregnant!!! So of course I assumed she would change her lifestyle, but not at all! Still smoking a pack a day, still drinking coffee and bitching all day long how pregnancy is a pain in the tush!! And it gets better: since she's smoking so much during her pregnancy, she started having delivery cramps at 28w and had to be rushed to the hospital and given plenty of drugs to keep the baby in there. She got out of the hospital, baby still in at 32w AND STILL SMOKING A PACK A DAY!!! It kills me!! Life is so bloody unfair: I'm very young, super healthy, non-smoker, can't even remember the taste of coffee and I have to go through IVF!! Phew, this is a great venting post, thanks LoMac

I soooo understand you! My BF suddenly decided to stop the pills one day and "see what happens". She an ex-drug addict, a heavy smoker and she above 35. And just two weeks later, she's pregnant!!! So of course I assumed she would change her lifestyle, but not at all! Still smoking a pack a day, still drinking coffee and bitching all day long how pregnancy is a pain in the tush!! And it gets better: since she's smoking so much during her pregnancy, she started having delivery cramps at 28w and had to be rushed to the hospital and given plenty of drugs to keep the baby in there. She got out of the hospital, baby still in at 32w AND STILL SMOKING A PACK A DAY!!! It kills me!! Life is so bloody unfair: I'm very young, super healthy, non-smoker, can't even remember the taste of coffee and I have to go through IVF!! Phew, this is a great venting post, thanks LoMac

I soooo understand you! My BF suddenly decided to stop the pills one day and "see what happens". She an ex-drug addict, a heavy smoker and she above 35. And just two weeks later, she's pregnant!!! So of course I assumed she would change her lifestyle, but not at all! Still smoking a pack a day, still drinking coffee and bitching all day long how pregnancy is a pain in the tush!! And it gets better: since she's smoking so much during her pregnancy, she started having delivery cramps at 28w and had to be rushed to the hospital and given plenty of drugs to keep the baby in there. She got out of the hospital, baby still in at 32w AND STILL SMOKING A PACK A DAY!!! It kills me!! Life is so bloody unfair: I'm very young, super healthy, non-smoker, can't even remember the taste of coffee and I have to go through IVF!! Phew, this is a great venting post, thanks LoMac

oh oh, my computer bugged and my reply got out 3x!! so sorry!!

now let me start by saying i have 4 kids.... and we worked soooooooooooo hard to have them...... i will not go back to work because i dont want to miss a second..... i really dont like to go out at night because i want to be the one to tuck them in at night...... i had this big a$$ of a neighbor while i was going through 9 rounds of iui and 3 ivf, and a mc at 12 weeks, she would say, oh god, all my husband has to do is look at me and i am preg. , this to me!!!! jacked up on clomid...... and then goes on, yeah i was stoned when i got preg. in a bathroom with my first, and my second...... wth!!! people are insenstive and rude sometimes, this woman , when i told her i was finally preg. with my first ivf, after 9 iui's said to me, " oh i had a really bad dream about this pregnancy of yours.... i just cant tell you the specifics" yeah, thanks i went on to mc at 12 after seeing a heart beat and telling the world!!!!! and through it all 2 years of iui's shots disapointments, she ws there saying, " oh i just cant imagine, i am so fertile" or " its just so unatural"
bitch, i went on to have twins finally, but man that woman really mentally abused me..... and now, she is divorced and complains all day how she is working so hard, and never has time for herself, the husband has the kids 2 days a week and every other weekend..... get a grip lady!!!! ok, sorry, that was a vent

we are doing a frozen cycle in feb, we have 4 embies left over from our ivf's, i consented to create these embies, i will give them a chance at life, what does she say, ARE YOU CRAZY!!! DONT Y OU WANT TO LIVE YOUR OWN LIFE???
s'