Infertility Support Group

In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.

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I am sorry to everyone going through this

DAMASROSE
DAMASROSE

Hello lovely ladies


My husband and I have been trying to conceive for 2 years and 2 months now with no luck. Here in the UK, we have to wait a long time before we get a specialist's help, so we waited and waited but got absolutely no where. They thought I had a blockage in one of the tubes, because of that, I ended up having a laproscopy, in which they discovered that everything is normal, and there is no actual blockage. We were happy and hopeful for a couple of months after that but when nothing happened, we got back to being in dispair. My husband is my rock, he is still optimistic, at least more than me, but recently he started talking about accepting the challenge and to try and find meaning and purpose in life without having children, that surprised me and scared me at once, because he is always the positive one, and if he started to loose hope, then shouldn't I too?

We are both in our mid thirties, having stable jobs, and cannot be more ready to look after and nurture a baby, but it is just not happening...I don't have my family around me, nor any friends. No one around knows because we haven't told anyone about our struggle. For me is a matter of pride perhaps. What makes it harder as many ladies here say, everyone else seems to have figured it out easily and got pregnant without any effort! I started to dread any friends and family-in-law events because everyone is either a parent or a parent to be apart from us! to make it even harder, my sister in law who got married a year after we did, got pregnant straightaway and now has a baby girl that steals all shows. I sit there, trying to look happy for them, while I feel like death inside...I hate to be that way, in fact, I was never that way, but this has been the most challenging obstacle I had all my life...



I am sorry to everyone going through similar thing. I feel your pain and frustration and I am here for you. Hugs xxx

BHAlwaysTrying21
BHAlwaysTrying21
I'm sorry it has been such a long and difficulty journey for you. It's so frustrating when no one around you understands or seems to have an issue. Since you haven't told any of your friends of family, I am sure it is really hard to always keep on a happy face and deal with all of our emotions inside. Hopefully this site will be able to provide you with an outlet, and maybe it will make you feel comfortable so that you can eventually talk about these things with the people closest to you. I really do find that helps! Sending hugs!
MrsO.
MrsO.
So much of what you said has resonated with me. I live in the UK too and we found the hoops we had to jump through exhausting. We would wait six months for a 5 minute appointment where the consultant would literally ask us the same questions “Still trying to conceive? How long?” and then refer us to someone else. It took 3 years before we actually got to have IVF 12 months ago. We have had two failed transfers so far from that round of treatment. Although we have embryos remaining, I have lost hope that they will be successful.

I don’t have my family around me either. Even though my husband’s family is lovely, they don’t really get it. In the time we have been trying to conceive my sister in law met her husband, got married and now has a 4 month old son. I’ve been really struggling to feel happy for her.

I’m so sorry for everything your going through. I wish I could say it got any easier for me. The only positive I have found is that it has really brought me and my husband even closer together.
JackieF
JackieF
Hi DAMASROSE, thank you so much for sharing your story. I could relate to so much of what you said and it breaks my heart. I understand the frustration of watching people around you get pregnant so easily and you just have to put on a smile and pretend to be happy when you really feel like you're dying inside. This journey is so difficult, but I have received so much comfort being able to reach out to other women who are struggling like I am and who can empathize with my pain. My prayers are with you and I send much baby dust for your miracle to arrive soon<3
WilsonBabiesComingSoon
WilsonBabiesComingSoon
My heartbreaks for you and all of us going through infertility. It's such an isolating journey. Even though infertility is common, it's not something that I can easily talk about with others because most don't understand and cant relate, even if they try. I'm so glad I found this group and thank you DAMASROSE for sharing your story. I'm in a similar position as you. My husband and I are also mid-thirties with good jobs. We couldn't be more ready for a baby. We have been going through infertility for a year and half now and had a failed IVF transfer last month. I handled it as well as could be expected, but it was devastating. IVF is so taxing...emotionally, financially and physically. But honestly the hardest part for me is facing everyone around me who seems to be getting pregnant without any problems and I feel like I'm always the first person they can't wait to tell. Our closest friends found out they were pregnant and made the announcement to us last week. My heart was crushed, but I put on a smile for them, asked them all the right questions..."how far along are you" "whats your due date" "do you know the gender yet?" and faked that I was happy. I'm still crying over it today. You're in my thoughts and prayers, DAMASROSE, and everyone else in this group struggling like we are.
Patience777
Patience777
Just joined tonight. Add me fo the list. I’m 39 and feel the same as everyone here. Been trying for 6 years. Two failed IVFs with poor embryo quality and so far 5 failed IUIs. Just started my 6th yesterday. I also never thought I’d be in this situation. Like a lot of women I studied and got my degree, then got married at 33 and started trying for a year. Then got diagnosed with the I word: Infertility. My DH was diagnosed with Low Sperm count at the age of 35. Mind you we had both gotten pregnant in our mid 20s with different partners and both resulted in termination. So we felt like hey we are definitely fertile. Nope. The doc wanted to know why at such a young age did he have a low count. We were sent to a fertility urologist. Came to find out he had large varicoceles. We had some marital issues for two years where we stopped trying. Then he had surgery to repair the varicocele at the age of 39. We were told he’d hopefully produce healthy sperm and his numbers would increase about 6-12 months post surgery. Plus they put him on Special Sperm Vitamins. Luckily things have improved, but I’ve also gotten older. Still no baby. We all have a story. Hang in there. You just never know. My friend had 16 IUIs and got pregnant. Then got pregnant by accident a year later. Keep going!!!! Explore all options. Even acupuncture. I’ve heard and seen amazing results. I’m also reading the book It Starts with the Egg. Eye opening. I’ve even been told about the anti-inflammatory diet which is basically paleo which helps increase fertility. Good luck!!!!
Voukat
Voukat
Hi there. After reading your post I could immediately relate to everything you said. My husband and I have been trying for 4 years and yesterday we had 2 blastocysts transferred and now waiting for the result. Have you considered IVF? We were diagnosed with unexplained infertility which is equally frustrating as any other type of infertility I suppose. What your husband said about accepting the challenge and moving on is totally understandable but I would suggest you do that after trying in anyway possible to get pregnant. I guess if it's not meant to be it's not meant to be. No one deserves to go through infertility and everything else that involves it. I fèel it has made me stronger in a way but at the same time it has made me drift away from friends and isolate myself a bit more.
I hope we all find our way and get through this..
cosmicgirl12
cosmicgirl12
I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I know how you feel. You're not alone with this! I don't have a uterus but I have a desire to become a mother. Well there are some options for me. I chose surrogacy. Now I'm looking for information and where it can be done. This process is not easy at all. Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck and no one can help. I can't talk about it with friends or family. All people I know have children and don't have problems with fertility. They just don't get it. They will never understand how I feel. It feels like every month someone announces their pregnancy. Every month someone makes a baby shower. Not to mention all those photos of kids in social network. This is so hard and sometimes I feel like I can't take it anymore. I don't want to be rude but sometimes I have to skip baby showers or babies’ birthdays. I have to make up reasons not to go and it makes me feel a bad person. But what can I do? I'm sure when I will have my baby it will be easy for me. I will be able to divide happiness of parenthood with my friends. But now it makes me feel even more stressed than I am.