I can imagine how angry this would make you!! WTH? I would reach out to her privately and respectfully explain that it took you by surprise and hurt your feelings to find out she had a baby over Facebook,, especially when you just spoke, and more especially when she knows your fertility struggles.

Even though it's maddening, I would let your anger settle a little before reaching out. You don't want to say anything that would affect a lifelong friendship forever!! (Even though it's tempting to do so in a fit of rage.)

WOW!
How can people do that, especially if they are your freind. That is a crappy and mean thing to do. I agree with PP, you should speak to her privately and let her know how shocked and mad/upset you are. Facebook sucks sometimes!

I'm so sorry, I know you've had a rough week or so and this didn't help. I think tinyblessings has some good advice, just wanted to share my empathy/sympathy with you (can't ever remember which one is right).

Could it be she didn't want to hurt you because she knows your struggles? I still think it would be better if she told you... but maybe she didn't mean any harm...

I understand your anger and hurt, but I kind of also see FrustratedPanda's point. It could be that she didn't want to bring it up if she knew that hearing all about baby things and people's pregnancies were hurting you. At the same time, you probably wanted the courtesy of knowing. It's difficult. We feel a lot of pain as IF people and seeing people around us having what we want, and it's easy to overlook how hard it is for the people in our lives to know what to say and what not to talk about in an attempt not to hurt us. I agree with tinyblessings that I would wait until I was calmer, and then talk with her privately. Explain how and why you are hurt and that you want to share in her happiness as her friend. I'm sure she was trying to protect you, but it ended up making you feel betrayed. It's so hard - there's no easy answer/easy way to handle the way IF affects our relationships.

I understand how hurtful that would be. Maybe she was worried about hurting your feelings and didn't know how to tell you. I have spoken with some of my friends about my infertility struggles and one of them told me that she just didn't know how to react or what to say to me for comfort. It can be a difficult situation when the other person has never been through the same struggles. How many times have we been "comforted" by someone who has never experienced the pain of infertility, only to have them naively say something to make you feel worse? There is a post in this group that was fairly recent about what NOT to say to an IF friend. I could relate to so many of the comments, yet see how the other person was trying to be supportive.

Before calling her up and making the both of you upset, maybe you should take a few days to calm down and think about what you want to say. Sometimes we say things out of anger that we may later regret. If you call her, maybe you could calmly talk with her and let her know that you are happy for her, but hurt that she didn't tell you in person. If she is as close of a friend as it sounds, I'm sure there is more to it than just blatant disrespect.