I totally felt like you after two rounds. I waited about 9 months before I did another IVF (I, luckily had insurance, so I was waiting 'till I was emotionally ready). I finally did get my BFP and DD with my 5th IVF. I'd also done two IUIs before moving on to IVF. If someone would have told me prior that I would go through all that to have a child, I would have told them they were crazy, so you really can do more and endure more than you think you can. Sad that we infertiles have to though. Good luck to you and hang in there!

I think the emotional toll IF takes on us is often ignored. Not just by other people, but by ourselves as well. It consumes your every thought and eventually your brain just needs a break. Don't feel you are weak or that others are somehow more determined than you. The fact is we all need mental breaks, not to mention physical ones, too!

I used to think that if I had 1 miscarriage I wouldn't be able to handle it and I would never, ever try again. I've had more than 1 now and we are still going. I took breaks after each one, some longer than others. Over the years I've learned that I need to do what feels right to me. If I need a break, I take it. Whenever the time comes that I'm ready to go back to the dr and start up again, that's when I do it and not a minute sooner. I don't force myself to do anything IF related unless I am physically and mentally ready to do so. In the beginning I would give myself a time frame, like 1 cycle off. When I'd force myself to start up again after that, I would be even more emotional and burn out faster. It affected my relationship with DH greatly. Then I started just letting myself relax and take the time I needed. Once I was actually ready, I was mentally rejuvenated and could handle a lot more for a lot longer, before I needed my next break.

So give yourself permission to take a sabbatical from the IF madness. Will it take 1 month or 1 year before you're ready again.....only you will know. Try not to obsess over how long it is going to take you to be ready. You'll know when the time is right for you.

((HUGS))

I did three IVFs and waited at least 6 months between each simply to get my brain and heart back in shape. The emotional toll of IVF is draining and it definitely takes time for a lot of us to be ready to tackle it all again. Not sure if I would have been able to do more than 3 IVFs like some ladies have on here.

Good luck to you! and take any time you feel like you need.

Thank you very much for your replies. It's also that sometimes friends do not understand what I am going through and make hurtful comments like - "shouldn't you be over this by now?", "get a grip, it's not the end of the world", "you are exagerrating" , "it will happen the next time" etc... I am wondering if they were in the same situation, would they be handling it so well?

@moonbeams , @YvonneKB , @LMWT

I'm just about to start my 1st cycle; so, I'm speaking theoretically, of course...

My husband and I made a pact. We decided we would do a maximum of 3 cycles (fresh or frozen, we didn't specify). I told him if wasn't sure I could even handle 3 and wanted to reserve the right to say "no more" at any point in the process. I totally get where you're coming from. This is such an emotional journey that there's only so much a person or a couple can endure. The fact that we set a limit, and are going to stick to it, provides some small shred of comfort.

Good luck to you. If you find yourself ready for another go at it, let us know. If not, then good for you! Only you can make this decision. You'll make the right one. I'm certain of it! :)