I'm not sure if this will help, but I understand what you are going through. My best friend is able to pay for IVF, and I am not. She is single, I am married... IVF worked, first try. She sent me her first ultrasound and I got to hear the heartbeat. I sobbed. I'm jealous because she is pregnant, a single woman, when I've been married for eight years wanting to be pregnant. I'm jealous because she can pay for IVF and I can't. However, I have to remember that she is my best friend, and has been there for me for 20+ years. She has been single for so long and needed something more. She worked very hard for the job and money that she has. She deserves this, and I should be happy for her. I want to be part of this. I don't want her to tip toe around my feelings. I will continue to cry, as that is hard to control; but that's ok.

The crying probably won't stop, but try to find support through your friends and family while on this journey. Know you are not alone.

It is SO hard. Especially when it is people close to you that you know you should be thrilled for. In my case, I was still joyous and excited when others got pregnant. But it was impossible for me to see reason. It just wasn't fair. Why wasn't it my turn. What did I do to deserve this. It was VERY hard for me. I will be honest... for me it didn't get better until I was pregnant with my daughter. ::hugs::

I just wanted to echo that it really is so hard, and you are certainly not alone. I've been there. When I found out my sister-in-law was pregnant early this spring, I cried for AT LEAST a day, probably more. And I've re-lived that, though usually to a lesser extent, for friends' announcements. I think if you need to grieve, you should. Better that than keep it all bottled up. Something that's really helped me though was doing something to have a positive interaction with their pregnancy rather than just the sadness and crying. So I like to send a small pregnancy gift--really does not have to be a big deal--but it makes me feel like I'm a positive part of the whole thing in some way rather than just a negative force. Hope are you starting to feel better.

I feel like there's just no getting around the sadness. I cry with most pregnancy announcements, more when it's someone closer to me. It's been better over the past few months, I think because I'm more hopeful now that we have an active plan and we are moving forward with IVF. I feel like the bitterness has left my heart as I focus on the hope. And there's a whole lot of talking to God about how I'm feeling! I wish that none of us had to walk this path. But I want to look back and be able to say that although this was a dark valley in my life, I remained steadfast and focused on good. Praying for you tonight! I'm so sorry for the hurt and sadness :(

Hi,
Just wanted to chime in and say that what you are feeling is very normal. It's difficult to be excited about someone's pregnancy when you're still waiting on yours to happen. There are studies of how infertility effects someone emotionally and it was compared to the emotional experience of someone who has cancer. No one understands, unless they have been through it themselves. Will be praying for you. Here's a quote from the Waiting for Baby Bird blog that has helped me: "To trust God in the light is nothing, but to trust him in the dark--that is faith." - C.H. Spurgeon