I'm glad you posted. This group is incredibly supportive and understanding. I'm sorry for your struggles, but happy you found us :)

Welcome to the group. I'm sure you will find this group of ladies to be everything you need on some days. I really hope we can help. I can relate to feeling weird actually posting to a group. I never thought I was "one of those people", but this group has been a community of people that actually understand and can offer support that even my husband can't give me.

I'm sorry for your struggles. It is easy to feel alone, especially when others around you are popping babies out easily. I think we are in similar situations. I've finished all the tests (and surgery) found no reason for my IF, and now an awaiting IVF. I've been waiting for the financial side for so long that it has given me time to accept that path, and do enough research to make it seem less scary. There are lots of videos that show how to do the injections and they have tips to help with any potential pain. As for the failure... I worry about that too. I can imagine a failed IVF cycle is so much harder to take than just normal TTC. It may be helpful to find a bunch of "things" you can do to help you cope. For me it's therapy, massages, yoga and running. Some people read, or just do random activities to keep happy and busy. I just turned 33, and everyone keeps telling me how young I am. Well, I don't feel young, so I understand the clock ticking feeling. I guess what most RE and Dr's mean is that we are young for IVF. So it may help our chances, which is a good thing.

I hope you are having a better day. Thinking of you.

wendy32.........I may be one of the only DH that post here, but I have to say, the road can seem endless. I went through infertility with my first wife.....3 years. We conceived 1 daughter on clomid and the other on clomid with the assistance of IUI. I figured there was no way i would encounter a road even more difficult in my second marriage. My DW is 36, we went through countless numbers of IUIs, spent thousands on fertility meds..........finally we had to face the IVF hurdle. Convinced that with unexplained infertility, this would at the very least answer some questions.

Well, we did ER on May 16, ET on the 21st and found out we are pregnant on the 30th. It's a very emotionally exhausting event. Questions arose........how many eggs would be retrieved, how many would make it overnight, how many would fertilize and then how many would make it to viable embryos........when they retrieve 10 eggs, you think your chances aren't great, but out of the ten we had 4 great embryos, put in two, froze two.

Our first ultrasound is today.........mainly to see how many took. So when you say it seems like the clock is ticking......I understand, but as the road may seem endless now, you'll be amazed how quickly you'll reach the rainbow if you just have faith in the process.

Best wishes to you and your DH!

thank you for your comments guys. i love hearing the positive stories from real people. it gives me hope when i feel my hope depleting! my husband is amazing and a very 'glass half full' person, but i am not! im always anxious about things so its easy for me to spiral into negativity. everything else in my life is good, but of course i focus on the 1 thing i do not have (like we all do) i just know i wont feel complete without children in my life.

Welcome wendy32... I am so glad you are here and posted...it is a hard road the road we are all on. Nobody gets it except if you've experienced it. I have not dealt with IVF, but I have had 8 years of all sorts of fun things :) And a very hard time believing I'd ever get anywhere.

I think that BR8259LA is correct when saying "the road may seem endless now, you'll be amazed how quickly you'll reach the rainbow if you just have faith in the process."

I had tried and tried, hoped and prayed, fought to get were I wanted to be...it wasn't until I finally let go and just believed it would one day happend when the time was right and I found A LOT of support on here with people who got it...whether it was to vent about family/friends or read stories of hope and sadiness, everyone was great. I am now 16 weeks via IUI. I'm so thankful and sometimes sad to share on here, because I know what it is like to feel the way you all feel, but I want to give hope...I never thought it would be here...just try to stay positive and keep moving forward...you'll get there. *Hugs* and baby dust to all!!!

Welcome to the group Wendy, although i'm so sorry you have to be here to begin with. This support group probably saved my life. I had NO WHERE to turn with all my pent up angers and frustrations. I am a success story after doing IVF, but i don't want to talk abou thatt. What i do want to share, is that i totally understand how nobody else around you "gets it." Also, i was the glass half empty person at home too, and DH would always get on me for feeling so down, but I just couldn't help it. And when i was feeling low, success stories pissed me off, because they didn't apply to me. I was suffering and sad. Like someone else said, people don't understand if they haven't went through it. I wish you the best of luck and hope you find comfort here!

Hey Wendy! I have never posted anything online either, but I was feeling down tonight and found this site. I can really relate to what you are going through. I have been TTC for almost 3 years now and have "unexplained infertility" and it is so frustrating! It feels like all I ever do is get poked and tested for different things every month at the doctor and take medication that doesn't do anything. I know I shouldn't compare my life to others, but it is so hard to watch friends get pregnant so easily. While you want to feel happy for them, it just doesn't feel fair. I try to stay positive and believe that everything happens for a reason, but some days are harder than others. I feel so guilty because I am blessed with so many things: wonderful husband, family, friends, etc, but I don't enjoy it because of infertility. I just started seeing a therapist, but honestly she just seems like another person who doesn't really understand.Hopefully this site helps, talking to people who do understand. :)

Hi Wendy. I am feeling down today too. We are sort of at the same point as you are. 1.5 yrs of solid trying with 6 mo prior to that not trying but not being careful. So call it 1.5 or 2 yrs, whatever.. I can't get past the point that its really not happening for us. Lots of tests, all came back normal. Husbands SA was good too. No explanation. I have been hesitant towards treatment because well there is nothing to "treat"!! I'm "normal" or whatever.. I keep thinking, well one more month.. but again, nothing. I'm on day 3 and back in touch with my RE talking options. He recommended Clomid plus monitoring and IUI. I told him I wasn't ready for IUI and I was nervous about multiples. So he is trying to get my insurance to approve Clomid plus monitoring only, without the IUI. We will see through the monitoring what my body is doing and try timed intercourse first. I'm totally depressed, confused, conflicted you name it. I never wanted to be where we are. I never wanted to "force" anything. I figured it if happened it happened, but now after so long of trying, it seems like we either take the next step or come to acceptance. I wish you all the best with your journey!! Know you aren't alone in your feelings.

thanks for the all the responses. meshel i completely agree and empathize with everything you said. i never thought id have to go through this; and that something that seems so effortless for most people is such a huge challenge for me. i have the same optomistic thoughts every month like "this time maybe it will happen" and then the devestating blow when yet again i doesnt. it's definetly challenging on a relationship too. we get frustrated sometimes and take it out on eachother. i wish more than anything i could give my husband the family he's always wanted. i hope that one day if it does happen this whole experience will make us closer. i guess it already has in alot of ways. im lucky to have a very patient, supportive man! hope you feel better soon! never give up hope :)

I have a question, because I really don't know.

I am supposedly still fertile, but 2 years now and unable to conceive...

What happens to the fertilized embryo's when you opt for IVF? TY!

Lisa, I'm not sure I understand your question. Are you asking what happens to the fertilized embryos that you received during a fresh IVF cycle, and maybe 8 were successfully fertilized but you only put two in? Say Then you would have six fertilized embryos remaining. Each clinic is different, but I know with mine we have the option to keep them frozen for up to four years or then they transfer them to a long-term storage facility. Or if you decide you don't want to use them ever, you have the option to discard them or abandon as they say, or use for research -but they assure you they not used in any manipulated way that creates another child. Or you can opt to donate them to another couple who might not have good sperm and or a quality and they need fertilized embryos. I hope answer your question

I am having a bad day emotionally today too. It's so hard to stay positive some days.