AFTER I FOUND OUT THAT I COULDNT GET PREGNANT WITH OUT HELP I WENT THROUGH A PHASE THAT I DIDNT WANT TO HAVE SEX AT ALL. WE JUST TRY TO DO MORE ROMANTIC THINGS AND HE WOULD SUPRISE ME WITH LITTLE THINGS AND THE FEELING WILL PASS. IT MAY TAKE A WHILE BUT IT WILL GET BACK TO NORMAL!!

We have been scheduling our "romantic" moments for the past three years in our quest to conceive, which really takes the fun out of it. It is more like a chore when it needs to be done on certain days...so, yes, I can understand your feelings.

ahhhh, sex? whats that? I have no desire at all. I told him to make an appointment b/c the more my d/h talks about it, the more I don't want to do it at all,,,ever...lol...poor guy, hope it passes for his sake! You are not alone...lucky right now we were advised no sex without protection...so i just turned it into no sex at all right now...we are mid cycle! fidn yourself making excuses? don't worry...but i do agree to try being romantic..it does help. Good Luck!

I love your this statement. It is so true and to the point of how I feel. Sometimes I talk myself into having sex when it time to conceive. I think sex is 90% mental and 10% physical.

I can totally relate. My husband always complained that he doesn't get enough. I've tried different things to help the situation and our sex life seemed to have been improving, but for the 1st time in his life he wasn't able to get an erection, and of all times it was when the doctor successfully retrieved my eggs and needed his sperm to fertilize them. I lost all of the eggs and all of the money we put into it. I'm not sure if I ever want to have sex with him again.

I hear ya girlie!

I've been lying to my DH saying that im really in the mood and can we please, i missed you soo much... because he hates to hear that hey, you've got get home ASAP. Its hard and i feel like my you know what would die for a vacation but... try, try, try and maybe it wil be better.

I totally agree!! What is the point? I don't know of any books on this, but if someone does, I would be interested too!! Our kids are coming from the lab, why would we need to have sex? I use to enjoy it, now the fun has all been taken out of it and so has the reason.

i have never hated it. But, I can say I had to tell myself around that time that i shouldnt think about conceiving. It is hard sometimes to not think about it then.

I have come to the conclusion that sex is much better when your not ttc. Everyone always made the concept sound so fun but, when you actually get there and theres a point to it... it loses all the spicyness to hear you spouse say "quick roll over" and your still breathless and trying to have a good time. Maybe try the old school just making out without sex, then you don't have the pressure of what if this time it would work looming over you?

Good luck.. :)

I can't really agree with hating it part but since my miscarriage and now that we are needing help of fertility meds to achieve pregnancy, I really don't have the urge to have it as often. Of course my DH is always ready for it but there have been cases of me just not wanting to try, which bums him out.

i hate it. i really wanted it like a day or two right before i ovulated, but for like months before and ever since i have not wanted to have sex. i make it a point to have sex with my husband periodically, just because he shouldnt suffer because i am depressed about not getting pregnant.

I AM 36 YEARS OLD AND I AM IN MENOPAUSE (BEEN 6 MONTHS SINCE MY PERIOD). SEX IS NOT THE MOST COMFORTABLE THING NOW. I HAVE TO USE KY &/OR REPLENSE TO HELP WITH THE MOISTURE ISSUE. WHICH DOESN'T MAKE IT THE MOST ROMANTIC PROCESS. MY HUSBAND DOESN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT MENOPAUSE DOES TO YOUR BODY. HE IS ALWAYS, "WHY DO YOU HAVE TO USE THAT?" WE DON'T NEARLY HAVE SEX AS MUCH AS WE DID BEFORE WE WERE TRYING. I FEEL BAD FOR MY HUSBAND. HE DOESN'T PRESSURE ME AT ALL. SOMETIMES I WISH HE WOULD, CAUSE MAYBE THAT WOULD GET US BACK TO WHERE WE WERE. BUT I DO AGREE THAT IF YOU ARE LIKE ME AND CAN'T GET PREGNANT OR ARE HAVING TROUBLE, SEX CAN BE A SAD THING TO HAVE.

you know i am about to have artificial insemination and i have to tell ya, naturally i love sex. And now that i am on all of the drugs and stuff me and my husband both are EXTREMLY excited and i guess i am just the opposite of you. its become more often and more enjoyable to me. I hope your precedures work out well and that you have a baby! And i hope that one day your desire comes back!

It probably sounds bad but in a way I resent our decision to try for a baby because that's when it all changed. I don't have a lack of desire so much, I can't stand the fact that each time it still crosses my mind "could this be it"? I miss just us, when we didn't think about it. I don't know that it will ever go away.

i feel that way all the time...when i found out i had PCOS and it would be hard if not impossible for me to get pregnant i stoppes having sex with my husband because i found no reason too! we aren't like men...we don't just have sex to get off! if you find out any advice...please let me know because my husband and i have sex maybe once every 2 weeks...and the only reason i do it is because i feel bad for him!