Infertility Support Group

In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.

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And now my ex has 2!!!

lina2008
lina2008
I found out yesterday that my ex now has two beautiful little children; his son who is 3 years old and now a little 4 month old I am so confused, upset and disappointed with God. How can he, the man who ruined my life, left me less than ten days before our wedding with out any explanation, robbed me of my father being able to walk me down the isle (my father passed away the following year from colonic cancer) and then proceeded to slowly destroy any semblance of self respect I had for the next few month be blessed with such a wonderful privilege TWICE while I get disappointment after disappointment, month after month

I feel like screaming, and crying and just kicking down the house from anger and frustration and rage I feel sick to my stomach and just want to curl up in bed and cry all day
deleted_user
deleted_user
Lina, I am so sorry that you are going through this and my heart goes out to you. Who is giving you this information any? While I know that it is easier said than done, but try not to let anything or anyone block YOUR blessings. What God has for you is for you and no one can take that away from you. He may have to beautiful gifts from God right now, but God has your gift already in mind and it is only a matter of time before you get it.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Man I am soo sorry you have to deal with these feelings.... I understand them all too well... I see so many ppl who don't even want kids pg and it just makes me sick...
I am just so sorry and I hope your blessing comes very soon...
deleted_user
deleted_user
It was strange for me to read your post because I can relate. I married my collage sweetheart at 22, we were married for six year, during which time I begged him to have children, he refused saying he'd rather have a Corvette than kids. Then he cheated on my (several times I found out), we got divorced and he took a huge chuck of money that my grandmother had given us (told me it was his payment for having to put up with me for six years) and promptly went out and bought a Corvette.

Now I find out he is remarried with two beautiful daughters while my new husband and I have three failed IVFs behind us. Totally unfair.

I've gone through my mad at God stage but here are a few things I learned:

1. Would you really want children with someone who is morally bankrupt? Imagine if you had had children together and ended up divorced and the father of your children being someone who teaches them those morals.
2. God has a plan for us, although it may not be what we had planned for ourselves. I did not want to get divorced from my first husband, went through all sorts of mental issues as a result, but in the end it led me to my wonderful new husband. I would have never believed it was possible.
3. I'm pissed too. Why can crack addicts and no-so-nice folk have kids and I can't? These feelings are normal. Bt my shrink told me something that really stuck with me- God doesn't love your ex any less than he loves you. Forgiveness is a powerful thing and God is full of it. Also remember that his new wife has just as much right to be happy as the rest of us.

Not sure if any of that helps but wanted you to know that you're not the only one that has been through it!
FNP
FNP
So so sorry it is just awful and unfair. I do believe that God does not control who has infertility. And that he is with us while we have this struggle and will also bless us with a family as well. Don't lose faith. God is with you I am sure of it and your dream will come true!