You stay motivated by stories of hope. We did 8 months of Clomid, 3 IUIs, 2 IVFs...the 2nd IVF worked, but ended in a very early miscarriage. We were supposed to take September off and then do some more IUIs while we were saving up money for a FET in the Spring...we got pregnant on our own in September and found out last night it is a baby boy. So it can happen. Before the IVF in August I had never been pregnant before...apparently for some women it takes your body recognizing what it means to be pregnant to have it work for you. I won't send you baby dust right now, but lots of positive vibes and the thoughts and prayers that you will find peace in whatever decision you choose.

We had been trying for years and went through rounds of clomid, femara, injections, and our first IVF was a BFN. We tried IVF 2 and I was convinced it would not work but I AM PREGNANT! I am in complete and wonderful shock right now. It can happen and the docs might change some things for IVF 2. I never thought I would be able to say I was pregnant. I haven't had my first u/s yet so I"m still a little nervous, but so excited to finally have reached this stage.

i had to two failed ivf cycles and what keeps me going ,is my desire to be a mother,i know that IF hurts a lot,but i will keep going until i get my miracle,only those that don't quit will get the prize,keep your faith and go ahead,believe it is possible,i hope that your dream becomes reality soon!

Well said lena2009! It's the desire to be a mother and the stories of hope and encouragement from all my DS friends that keep me going on this long roller coaster ride.

I was in the same place you are a year and a half ago. I had no interest in going through IVF for a second time. I was ready to adopt. My mind was made up. My first IVF ended in a very early miscarriage and I was so upset that I couldn't even talk about it let alone deal with it for almost 4 months.

My DH really wanted a bio child so I finally agreed to go and interview other RE's. (I HATED my RE.) Their positive vibes and the way I felt about them plus all of the family, friend, and DS support got me going again. I also said that if I did IVF for a 2nd time that was going to be it so I took almost a year to get my head in a good place and I added acupuncture to it well before starting the 2nd cycle.

I'm so glad we did it as I am due in 9 weeks. I wish you the best of luck on making this hard and difficult decision. I say that if you are not ready then wait until you are so you can be totally committed and in a good place mentally. Hugs!!

The third was the charm for me. It was a hard decision to make since I don't fertilize while in the lab, but I figured it would at least give me answers. I can tell you the protocol was different all three times, but ONLY with the third did I do acupunture and I ate fresh pineapple which is suppose to add in the implantation process. It was my best cycle by far and I got two fert. embies. One stuck. I am in my ten week. I took some time off and only tried it again when I thought I was ready to accept the answers (good or bad). I wish you the very best in your journey.

Don't give up yet! I did 5 IUI's and 2 fresh IVF's. After 2 early m/c the 2nd IVF worked. I'm 12wks now! I know the pain, disapointments, and the expense. I also did acupunture with my 2nd IVF which I haven't done with previous cycles. BEST OF LUCK!!

Hi.

Well I suppose I'm lucky in some ways, I've just finished my very first type of fertility treatment ever, and it was IVF with PGD. (I was diagnosed with Turner's Syndrome in '09).
So I haven't had the heartache of hope and exhaustion of attempts that must come with other fertility treatments that the vast majority, yourself included have to struggle through before reaching IVF.

For some IVF comes too soon, for others it's a long hard road to get there.

I did however experience only three times the heartache and devistation of trying naturally and ending up with miscarriages and no answers, which left me beating myself up and weak and drained for months at a time.

Well, unfortunatly with our first IVF cycle we didn't beat the odds and it ended in miscarriage on Christmas' Eve.

But, I have a diagnosis and we know what we're dealing with.
We know the odds are low and we know I've only 2 years to do this before menopause kicks in.

So, I'm feeling okay, it's sad and misfortunate to go through this again, HoWeVeR;
we have done everything and more in our power to up the odds and assure the best odds for our embryos.
The only thing we can do on top of that is treat ourselves well.

We are now waiting for my period to begin our second IVF+PGD cycle, a fresh one, I don't produce enough eggs to have any frozen once we've passed the PGD stage.

This cycle holds all the risks of failure at every stage as the last one did , and I am taking heart in that we have infact been able to get this far with our first attempt, I was quite amazed to find out any of our embryos were viable.

So, I am hoping we will have a similar outcome of 2 in 8 embryos making it to the transfer.

This whole IVF deal is a hell of a lot to go through for anyone, it is draining, demanding, intense, consuming and that's without mentioning the emotional and mental aspects of it.
If I was not already into the menopause zone, I would be taking a 3 month break to recooperate and improve my mental and physical fitness.
But where we stand I am doing okay and avoiding beating myself up by re-enforcing the facts;

We've done all we can, a whole lot more than most have to do and it still didn't work.
There aren't any reasons that can make it better, but those reasons we have and I can take peace with that to be okay about this miscarriage.

It isn't all easy for me though, I have my days and moments, but on the whole I'm toughing it out.

That's what I know about me and my situation.
You and your situation are yours and you are the only one who can know and decided if you are able to carry on.

the danger for me is that the information and technology avaiable to us puts me in a position of hope and trying where 25 years ago I'd just be "barren" and move on.

The double edged sword of technological advances.

But it's 2010 and I'm able to do PGD and IVF and give us a chance of 20% instead of 2%.
So I personally cannot deny the possibility of that slim chance.

Also I feel less pressured in some ways because of the menopause, we only have 2 years, so I know that soon there will be a point where, as if pre-IVF days, we have no choice but to move on to other options be it adoption, egg donor, or a childless life.


Well, I suppose I should shut up now!

Just know that although today is impossibly hard and tomorrow is tougher than over-cooked squid...there is a day where all of this, no matter how hideous, devistating and intense, this day ahead of us where things will be better regardless of the outcome, and for that day to come sooner we need to make sure we remember to make memories worth holding on to in the darker days between now and then.


God bless you and keep you strong, your own heart knows what you need to do, listen to it and be strong, and use your head to move forward in good timing.
No one can put pressure on yourself like you do, so promise yourself to be good to you.

Love motormouth-mamijo.
Xx

Yesterday on the side of our fridge, we found the list of tests from when I first went to an RE two years ago. I remember DH and I getting into the car following the appt and I cried and cried. I was so sad and so overwhelmed and scared. Now we find the paper and laugh (I keep it just to remind me). We went through it and now it isn't scary anymore. I remember when I got my first box of IVF meds last August and I cried. This time for round number two, I received an even bigger box...and put it under the Christmas tree. I don't want to do round two. I want round one to have worked. But, it didn't (it did but I miscarried). I can't live with myself if I don't do everything I can to help nature. So, my motivation is that if I survived it before (and there were plenty of speed bumps) then I can do it again and what if this time, it works and next year we ring in the new year with a new baby. That's the thing about us ladies here, we are willing to do absolutely anything and we will be the best mothers ever. Whatever your decision, good luck. :)

I did IVF #1 and FET got BFP twice and m/c twice, ending last nov with a d/c. I AM READY TO START LUPRON AGAIN TODAY. What's the other option??
IVF is a super tough journey, but the choice is only one, be strong and try again.
You have more support here at DS then at home,with DH or friends. They cannot understand.
But everyone is different, take as much time as you need to heal, I try not to waist anymore time, I am 41 and I did my first IUI in april 09, IVF sett 09, FET oct 09.
Time goes by fast and if you do not act and go GET what you want nobody will.
let's be buddies and make this journey as easy as possible.
all the best to you and a tons of baby dust

Reading everyone's struggles with IF (including my own) breaks my heart!!! I I really hope we can all share in each others successes ASAP!

Someone posted awhile back an article from a woman that decided to stop IF. It was really hard for me to read!!!! I guess there comes a time for some couples when you have to make a decision as to what is next...or not. Anyway, here is a link to the article. It's called A Roadmap for Life Without Children.
http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/09/10/life-after-infertility-treatments-fail/

I think with each failure our RE's have more information to help us with a higher rate of success for the next one. That's my hope. I had one failed IVF, one transer (miscarried at 6 1/2 weeks) and now waiting to start the 2nd IVF. It was crazy. When I found out I was miscarrying my first thought was...I can't do all those meds again for another IVF, I hated it so much). But, I agree with the others, I just want a kid so badly, I can't give up. Good luck, and I hope time helps you to make the decision that's right for you.

I've done 6 rounds of IVF with no luck but lots of ppl succeed so keep trying!! Good luck and don't give up hope...
www.wishtobeamommy.com

I must tell you I had given up in alot of ways. After my first cycle failed i was just so devastated and fear set in. But then I started the shots and Hope came back. Please don't give up.. Please IVF will bring you your miracle. I thank my friends here b/c they gave me hope when i didn't have any. I'll be sure to help you now because you Will be a MOMMY!