one of my first therapists tried hypnotism and age regression on me and it didn't work. i've tried hypnotism for other things as well and it just doesn't "take" on me. i do know that once i started therapy and started talking about the things i did remember, other stuff started coming back - sometimes in little flashes, sometimes in overpowering and intense details and not with good timing. I got better at handling it and controlling it over the years. do i remember EVERYTHING? no, but even people who haven't suffered abuse don't remember everything about growing up. i remember enough, though. sometimes you reach a point where you don't want to know anymore. just start talking about it, a lot will come back once you open the floodgates.

I am the same age as you and perfectly understand your urgency. I haven't tried hypnotism but I have a friend in the sexual abuse support group who has done most of her healing through work with a hypnotist therapist. Nevertheless. I don't think you can force the memories, even with hypnosis. And people who have a sudden influx of memories can be thrown into a suicidal depression.

I would never tell you to forget about it and just move on. I tried that for a lot of years, and it sounds like you did too. We both know it doesn't work.

What I am trying to do is develop a relationship with the younger parts of me that got cut off from my consciousness. I am trying to connect with them so that I can heal them. So far I am not getting specific detailed memories but I am remember what that child felt more and more. When I feel too much at once it gets overwhelming and I realize why I can't bear to remember it all at once. For me, a little at a time is working, even though it's slower than I would like it to be.

The thing is, if we can remember slowly then we can maintain our adult part, and that part can help the child part. If too much of the past comes up at once, we fall into the child's mind and lose our adult perspective. The feelings become overwhelming and can even be dangerous, if we become suicidal. So the reason to go a little bit slowly is so that the adult you can be there for the child you and comfort her/him and help the child understand that it was not their fault, and help them to heal. I believe that is the healing process. Falling into the child's mind prevents healing because we become overwhelmed.

This is my take on it, anyway.

Maybe if you put your system under pressure you will retrieve memories. by which I mean whatever your self-soothing is, refuse to do it. So if that's self harm, don't let yourself.

What do you think? is it worth a shot? :)

I care about the members who struggle with recovering their memories.

Once I went into therapy mine were all there and it did help to link some fears and avoidant behavior to the causes. I found what I most needed to vent about was the people whose betrayal was ongoing and who ultimately destroyed a relationship for all time - in my case it was immediate family.

The other stuff rounds out the picture of how helpless I was as a child and how unprotected. I think it is sufficient to focus on the things you remember and how it affected you. If no more memories surface, it may be because they are not necessary to heal. If you don't trust someone, trust yourself that there is cause.

I find the memories return when I am ready.

Dialectical behavioral therapy & cognitive-behavioral therapy are good for building resilience, which you'll need.

Memories hit like a truck, in my experience.

I was always busy and very involved in things during my life. Then I was forced to retire by medical issues, my father died while I was caring for him, and suddenly I was adrift.

At first I was a mess, but gradually I adjusted as people do. When I settled down, the memories started surfacing. I think you have to be in a safe and secure place in life with no pressing concerns for optimum memory retrieval. At least that's been true for me.

And like Pumpkin, I found that it helped to get disentangled from my toxic family members who were still living. After a lifetime of thinking the way I was trained to think, I'm finally starting to see things in perspective.

When the memories started coming out of me, I was shocked. I had repressed so much. It's no wonder I've had all these mental and emotional issues for so long. After the nightmare of my childhood, I consider myself fortunate that I'm still living.

It was like a cascade effect for me. I started remembering little things, then more and more. When the pieces started fitting together, I realized the full extent of what had happened.

The biggest realization is that I wasn't a problem child and I'm definitely not mentally ill...I'm a member of the walking wounded. There are a lot of us around.

Hi dodge- I think you should try hypnosis (with a very well-trained therapist) simply because no one else can know what works for us until we try it ourselves. But it's important to get the best therapist possible. Like others have said, recovering memories can be pretty traumatic.

I tried hypnosis and began to panic, but the therapist knew to stop immediately. You have to trust that the person hypnotizing you is very attuned to your reactions so you can adjust the therapy to your personal readiness level.

How much you need to remember in order to heal is also something that's different for everyone. It's so hard to deal with trauma when you can't really understand where all the pain comes from, but (Good for You!) for being brave enough to explore.

Hello, I have found role play and free association,with reenactments,has helped my partners remember. jrusselb913@yahoo.com we should chat.JACK