Incest Survivors Support Group

Incest refers to any sexual activity between closely related persons that is illegal or socially taboo. Consensual adult incest is very rare. Incest between adults and prepubescent or adolescent children is a form of child sexual abuse that has been shown to be one of the most extreme forms of childhood trauma. If you or a loved one is a survivor of incest, join the group...

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hopeless25 10/03/2012

I can be ok all day but once night hits i can't fuscus :-/ I have hw that needs to get done but i have to get up extra early to do it cause i can't focus for long... Anyone else have problems focusing at night and ok in the day?

deleted_user 10/04/2012

Hi hopeless,
it could be that you're a morning person.
In my family my husband is a night person - he can work fine until whatever time but getting him out of bed is a nightmare in the morning; I am useless after about 8 pm but find it easy to get up and get going. I've read some interesting articles about this and about how it is something innate in us. They tend to group people into one of 3 categories morning, daytime and night, but I'm sure there must be a lot of overlap as we're all individuals.

I look around the people I know and I see similar patterns. I know two who don't like being up after 9pm and get up at 4 or 5am because it suits their body clock.
There's nothing wrong in this (although not great or parties!)

moonface21 10/04/2012

I was conditionned to "switch" personalities from a very early age because day was more or less safe but night time was the starting of danger and abuse so the signal in my body and mind was to get hazy, tired and not stay up or get intoxicated to block what was going to come.I would thus prepare myself for the coming "hassault" and get out of my body on time .
This mental programming stayed engrained with me until I noticed the pattern and convinced myself that I now was safe, that I could enjoy my evening and stay up and aware without danger.

deleted_user 10/09/2012

Yes nights can be a problem because it gets dark and the noises seem louder and the flashbacks and nightmares are worse. I understand what you are saying. Nights kind of make me feel NOT as safe as during the day so I cannot focus on anything else but noises and safety... making sure (even if I am not alone) that doors are locked and blinds are pulled down so nobody can see inside my house. There are things you can do to help feel safer so you can function and focus better. EMDR therapy for example... it takes a while but it does help.

hopeless25 10/10/2012

Thanks guys from commenting and sharing its like my mind things the worst thoughts at night i always say nights aren't my territory my emotions get taken over and idk it just sucks :-/

deleted_user 10/10/2012

I am a morning person, but I cant hardly sleep at night lately -- coz I am afraid and Im always hearing things in the house -- like someone on here said, noises are louder at night.
I hope that you find the peace you are looking for. I Know that one day I will once again feel safe, as you will too.
lots of hugs

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