Ouch. Be careful with the electronic communication, especially with emotionally sensitive topics. I no longer use e-mail for sensitive issues because there is too much distance and e-communication does not convey body language or voice tone.

It is a good way to try and catch someone at what they did. If you can get them to admit it through email that is something you could use in court. Random thought. Sorry

I thought I responded but I guess I got too tired and absent minded or just forgot to hit the add button last night....Anyhow...

Wait, are you supposed to see your Mom's side of the family for Thanksgiving or your Dad's? Hmmm, I seem to be a little confused at the moment. Thanksgiving in Canada and the US are still some time away, are you seeing Dad's side this weekend and Mom's Thanksgiving?

Either way, it sounds as though your uncle is uncomfortable with you trying to bring up the subject of abuse and I doubt that he will press you for much more information than you've given him. I also doubt that he will go poking around for more information with other's in your family if that's your concern. He may not be disinterested but maybe it's too painful a subject for him or he may be like my step-dad and doesn't really know how to deal with strong emotions.

It's your right to tell whoever you choose, when you choose and in your own time. Your stepmother should respect that, if she can't, then maybe you should limit your contact with her. You deserve her respect.

If you do decide that it's time to start talking to other people in your personal life about what happened to you, I'm sure that you'll find it really isn't as scary as you are imagining it to be and you'll likely be surprised at how much support you receive.

Are you by any chance a future worrier?

I was terrified about telling my family - but their reaction has been to carry on as if I had said nothing. There is absolutely no fear of any of them talking to anyone about it - which actually pisses me off because I bloody well want them to talk about it. I want them to break their silence and acknowledge what he did. In my experience most people don't want to talk about childhood sexual abuse - especially when it's in their family.

If you want to see this side of your family (and there's no reason why you should, if you don't want to go, don't, they have no right to make you go if you don't want to) then you can hold your head high. You did nothing wrong. The shame is your grandfathers, not yours.

I feel just like reply 4.
That was true for me too.NOT one single person in my "family" wanted to hear it.Or talk about it nothing....They ALL of them including nephews and nieces just errased me from existance.That easy.

As soon as i started talking my whole, i mean every sinlg person in my "family" blocked me from their e.mails never sopke to me or about it again and i never heard from them again.

It is so sad the way be react. I am spending Thanksgiving Day with my Mom's side of the family and that Saturday morning with my Dad's family. They all live on Long Island I now live upstate, so I do not see everyone as much. I am very mad at myself for posting it online. I do not think he will share. I ended my relationship with my Stepmother and stepsisters over the summer. My Dad died on Christmas in 2009 and they did not call my sister or I until the next day. Never really be close to them. It was my Dad's third wife and i was in college when they got married. They lived in Minnesota and Arizona.