Incest Survivors Support Group

Incest refers to any sexual activity between closely related persons that is illegal or socially taboo. Consensual adult incest is very rare. Incest between adults and prepubescent or adolescent children is a form of child sexual abuse that has been shown to be one of the most extreme forms of childhood trauma. If you or a loved one is a survivor of incest, join the group...

917 Members
4,738 Posts
0 Online
Personal Challenges
/ Incest Survivors Support Group

It's hard and I need to let it out again

loum50
loum50
I'm doing well. Better than I see myself doing, but there is much that needs to change. It feels overwhelming. Right now I'm working on the connection with my hurt child within. The daily suicidal, the self hate, the anger , the fear, the worry and the shame feel overwhelming.. I try to let him know that it wasn't his fault, that he was innocent, sensitive and smart. Things to be
valued and not abused for. My therapist tells me that it takes courage to face these things, but I don't feel courageous. I feel weak and afraid. I want my child within to feel safe enough to express his pain and to let out the tears. I did start to tear up last week in therapy. I have therapy tomorrow and hope I can go further. I know that it takes courage to face those things, but what I know and what I feel are two different things. I try to surround myself with comfortable things and to take care of myself and to tell myself that I deserve those things. It's so hard to fight the brain washing from my father.
nelliefay
nelliefay
hang in there Loum, you're doing good work, and feeling fear doesn't mean you lack courage. I'm all for inner child work, it's really helped me too.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Tis a hard task at hand, the brain washing (Hurt) we endured in our formative years -- I can relate to your thoughts and how your feeling. I look at it sometimes and I feel weak, not courageous at all. But the truth is, we have developed survival mechanisms for all we've gone through and now they dont serve us so well -- and We are courageous, brave, and we will continue to push through what life throws us -- You are fighting the good fight, and whether you know it or not, YOU WON! and so have all of us, we just need to graps it :)
Lots of hugs
deleted_user
deleted_user
This is how I feel at the moment Ioum - can we do it together?
loum50
loum50
I want to thank you for your support. It means so much to me and makes me feel less alone.
moonface21
moonface21
Yes, Loum you are very couragous.It looks very frightening to go into those areas we could not face before.I am in that phase too.What has helped me is to realise that ,not only have I got hurt children parts inside me .
I have also got a wise"me" who is totally aware of the whole patterns of my mind and helps me without me being conscious of it.
I guess this is what some call a "higher power"or the inner self healer or the nature of the mind.
Becoming aware of the brainwashing is also very useful.It has enabled me to start repairing the inner sabotage work .installed by my father and continued by my abusive introject parts.if that makes sense to you.
I am restoring each aspect of my life, step by step, trying to be gentle with myself like you do.
I find the 12 promises very inspiring.They have come true to me, except the financial stability!But it will come too, in its own time.
loum50
loum50
Therapy was very intense today. There is a part that is revolted by that hurt child part and today we looked at why. The part that is revolted is actually protecting the child part from feeling all that pain. It was exhausting work. I'm trying to let that child part feel safe enough to let that pain out so it can be healed.