Incest Survivors Support Group
Incest refers to any sexual activity between closely related persons that is illegal or socially taboo. Consensual adult incest is very rare. Incest between adults and prepubescent or adolescent children is a form of child sexual abuse that has been shown to be one of the most extreme forms of childhood trauma. If you or a loved one is a survivor of incest, join the group...
I've always been so tempted to run away, even have a few times. I figure that if I can't die and leave the problems behind then I should run away from the source. It's hard to live under the same roof of one of the people that fucked up your life and the other that just sat back for a while and let it happen... Ive been through CPS before and they said they could take me away and they might but I don't want to leave someone I love very much... That's also why I'm still alive is because of this person. I dont feel safe here, I don't feel comfortable and I don't wanna be here anymore. I can't stand living with the man that beated me til I bleed or til I was black and blue, who told me I was worthless, a failure, a big mistake. Who banged my head against walls and tripped me. And the women that sat back and watched me suffer not even trying to make things better. My sister who hit me, spat at me, kicked me, called me a stupid bitch.... My uncle and cousin who both held me down and raped me. I cried, I bleed. They destroyed my body, I have pain and nightmares every fucking night... I can't live with this anymore but I can't die. I've attempted suicide 7 times.. Each a failure... So if I can't die and leave my problems behind, I'll stay alive but I sure as hell won't stay here...
That said, I also subscribe to the belief that although we can't find a reason for what we endured, we can assign whatever purpose to it we choose - whether it be healing ourselves or others.
I find with incest survivors (myself included) there's a depth and level of empathy not otherwise present. You have an understanding of the human condition that those who haven't experienced your pain, could never fathom.
You have so much to offer in this world.
You have an understanding that can't be matched.
Don't rob the world of it or escape it..... rather, see if there's someplace or someone inside that can embrace that awareness, that profound understanding, and use it to benefit.
Although it may seem overwhelming to think of right now, just know you're valuable, lovable and perfect just as you are.
I'm glad that you found DS and you have my support.
I met him online. He's in England.
Long-distance close friendships are really possible with der interweb.
Better than staying and having to look at your rapists.
I have a blog, faithshope.blogspot.com you might find it helpful.