Incest Survivors Support Group
Incest refers to any sexual activity between closely related persons that is illegal or socially taboo. Consensual adult incest is very rare. Incest between adults and prepubescent or adolescent children is a form of child sexual abuse that has been shown to be one of the most extreme forms of childhood trauma. If you or a loved one is a survivor of incest, join the group...
I am 16. I was raped by my father for 3 years. It is hard to say it. But the good news is i told. I didn't wanna be a 16 year old girl pregnant with my father's child. Can you image? Me with a child at 16? I mean heck lots of girls are but.... that is to young for me. It'd be a nightmare though if it was my fathers! [i wasn't pregnant at all] He made sure I'd tell him when my period started so he knew I wasn't. It was a pain. Everything I'd start I'd have to wait till no one was around to till him. With my family I was just about always alone. It made me the perfect target. I have friend issues and was never close to anyone but my grandfather who died a month or two after he started all this.
It is scary to realize everything that he has done to me; even though i barely remember half of it all. As far as i remember it was mostly repeat of the normal stuff. So when i talk about it, it is just the same and every now and then it'd be a different house and a different room. To think that there was no real safe spot in my house except my sister's and my brother's rooms. Everywhere else was like a trap. I an a loner and I don't have many friends. Since i had/have barely anyone to run to i was like a dear in head lights.
Yes, i am only 16. And yes my father is in jail for 12 years. But i am afraid of what will happen when he gets out. Will he come looking for me? Will he want to kill me for telling? It all scares me.
Well this is some of my story. I will try and write more some other time.
It is scary to realize everything that he has done to me; even though i barely remember half of it all. As far as i remember it was mostly repeat of the normal stuff. So when i talk about it, it is just the same and every now and then it'd be a different house and a different room. To think that there was no real safe spot in my house except my sister's and my brother's rooms. Everywhere else was like a trap. I an a loner and I don't have many friends. Since i had/have barely anyone to run to i was like a dear in head lights.
Yes, i am only 16. And yes my father is in jail for 12 years. But i am afraid of what will happen when he gets out. Will he come looking for me? Will he want to kill me for telling? It all scares me.
Well this is some of my story. I will try and write more some other time.
Did you have evidence or? How long did it take for them to convict him?
Someone once told me that home should be a safe place. That helped me lift some of the shame I was carrying and be a little more able to provide some compassion for myself. It's true. Where you sleep should be a safe place.
I think the fact that you told the school counselor was very brave. Both you ladies in this discussion are very brave.
I know this may sound trite, but can you try your best to not worry about him getting out of jail just yet? My therapist often has to remind me to "cross that bridge when I come to it". I too was fearful the abuser would come kill me after disclosure. She reminded me that murder is a separate crime from incest/molestation.
Hyper vigilance and wanting to feel like you have some control over the future is a normal reaction to not having a safe home environment. You are likely a very highly aware individual because of it.
Thank you for sharing and welcome. I hope you find this place as safe and as helpful as I have.
Tom B. aka Ihman