Many years ago, I enjoyed a healthy relationship with my first wife, sharing fantasies (story telling) was warm and enjoyed with no negative side effects. Her problem was that she lived other fantasies through methadone and multiple other drugs so that a divorce was inevitable and probably life saving for me ...this was just before HIV and all that and YES I was tested and am whole. My big problem, and it affects ED and everything since is that during the divorce, she filed papers, at the request of her lawyer, that described our stories in the cold, brutal and sterile language of the law. You have no idea who much the bottom dropped out of my life at the point, and all that wonderful, weird area of life went into hiding - has stayed there ever since. I am remarried and every so often, have shared but immed when I do I am back making love with HER again and so shutdown. Over the years, yes, I am normal but the stigma is long and enduring. Could it get me hard? Yes, but I am always back THERE with HER when I go near this subject. And so I am in a Catch 22 bind if ever there was one.