What is it like to not have hydrocephalus? When you do not have anyone to talk with in your immediate vicinity it drives you nuts. If I EVER try and discuss my feelings about this i would be told in so many ways that "I don't want to hear it". The loneliness about this disease is so overwhelming. I have depression and seizures along with this. I have tried to vent but it does not good. I mean when you are in your 50s and you still have this problem something needs to be done with regard to your emotional state. They say that your thoughts drive you to the way you feel about yourself. How do you talk to someone so that you can change your thinking? What if there was a way that I could throw in the towel and start over. I have always heard from advertisements that if you smoke and drink then you have sex then your child stands a good chance of a birth defect. THANK YOU MOTHER AND FATHER. I have never said that shit to anybody because I am always told to shut the hell up. It is a big problem of accepting the fact that I have this disease and moving on but shit is building inside me and it is getting difficult. I had to vent about inner feelings here. I am not done but I need a break.