Guarded seems to be the best word to explain why I have hesitated to post this news; however, I wanted—no needed— to share with my DS friends, who have become such an integral part of my journey, about the gentleman who has entered my life. This is one huge giant step for me. I fought reasonable and unreasonable fears for quite a while; it took a lot for me to admit that I was ready to move forward with this aspect of my life. My thanks to Hopeful Hearts and all who have been brave enough to share their hopes and fears for a possible future with another. It is my desire that this post might add to the encouragement that others offer on HH as relationships form and go forward. As with loss, I don't believe there are short-cuts—it's a journey cluttered with stumbling blocks of all manner of emotions and fears and tons of baggage. After much thought, I believe the hindrances of insecurities and reservations may be overcome by an unwavering faith in the budding relationship and the love it produces. It takes time and much effort to sort through issues the heart and mind doles out to us sojourners: scars remain on our wounded hearts that take tender care to heal.

Last year and after six years of loss, the acceptance of where I was on this "far-reaching" journey, and recognizing a personal contentment of my juncture in life, a gentleman entered my world when I least expected it who has captured my heart. It all started with occasional comments on one another's DS posts that led to infrequent online chats here on Daily Strength, progressing to a valuable friendship, moving ahead to a phone call here and there, and then advanced to meeting one another face to face. I guess you get the picture that it was at a very slow pace. To say that I am overly protective of my emotions is an understatement, and coupled with the apprehension of having feelings for another man in my life, it is a marvel that I find myself at ease and happy in this relationship.

As many DSers have mentioned, I too struggled with the thought of caring for someone again, the fear of another loss, and the fear of yet more changes and adjustments that I wasn't sure I could handle. Finally, I was able to admit that I was willing to deal with the hurdles one at a time as I encountered them.

It has been a year since we started this new journey: a year of learning what it means to blend the past, present, and possible future. At first we haltingly walked forward, stepping carefully into undefined opportunities. Too much time had passed (after all, we're not teenagers any longer) to have it down pat as to how to do the getting-to-know-you thing—at times awkward; at times unbelievably comfortable. The simplicity of the journey arrived when we understood that it wasn't just the two of us entering this new path; it was the four of us. My beloved husband and his beloved wife are a key part of what we will be in our future together, if that is to be. The respect with which we punctuate our new future with our past lives is truly a gift—a gift that I have decided to not refuse but to accept with optimism. We have embarked on a journey that will create new memories; a journey that will, no doubt, include some snares, countless compromises, and joyful resolutions.

The gentleman who has met my family, the gentleman whose family has become part of my thoughts and prayers, the gentleman who makes the miles between us worthwhile to travel, the gentleman whose kindness and helpfulness were the first character qualities I noticed, and the gentleman who brings an immediate smile to my heart is Dan (DS username Daninmn [creator of the DS support group, Help Line for WidowsWidowers]). This is the beginning of a new chapter in our lives. There are more chapters to write, and we are praying for God's guidance as we script that novel entitled "Us." Blessings to all. I'm so happy to be able to share this news with my DS family. TJ