When I found out this past January I wanted to tell a few of my friends and family right away. But I listened to my partner and have only told a very small select few. Once you open that door, it never closes as tight as you want it to. And I have found out no matter how close of a friend they are, people still talk. So if you don't want some people to know then be cautious. If you are comfortable with it then it that shouldn't be a problem. I was reluctant to tell my Mother at first because of HER health and I didn't want her to worry about me, not that she would think any differently of me. But when my Grandmother was recently in the hospital I ended up telling my Mother, plus the fact she saw me taking my medication and questioned me. I was never good at keeping things from her anyway. She actually took it quite well, better than I expected, and has given me support. She actually floored me and said, you are going to be fine, they have come along way. Coming from someone from her generation I was shocked since I figured she would think it was a death sentence, but she turned to me and said "Your Mother is not stupid" Go Mom..lol She also checks in on me and makes sure I take my Meds and I am eating right. As far as anyone else in my family, I have a small family and I am not ready for anyone else to know yet. In time that may change.

I think Tuck said it all. Go Mom, that's awesome. Vasstro, welcome to DS. Great community here, very supportive & informative. Let us know if we can help.

Good question, & thanks to Stigma, sometimes we take a bad rap. Like Tuck shared, you can't take it back once you let people in. On the other hand, like Tucks Mom, it's the perfect scenario for support. We need support. BUT, if the person you trusted turns out to be harmful, it's a different situation & it truly can be harmful. It's most likely a stress that you haven't encountered & one that will linger forever. Stress is our enemy, & worry is just as harmful. Once it's out to the wrong people, that worry will always be here. Please be judgmental in who you take off the mask for, I know, its lame. But its self preservation. I've witnessed the wrath stigma for over 32 years, it's not gentle.

Welcome vasstro

So did you disclose to your family, vastro? I tested poz in 2011, and never disclosed to family. I never wanted to, mainly because my mother is annoying enough if I tell her I have a cold, last thing I need is her to be overbearing because of HIV. I think it's a choice - I'm not required to share my health issues with them if I do not want to. Hopefully your family is better.

Yes edgewater I did told some family the only those I wanted to know told some female cousin around my age group they understand and totally supportive told one of my brother's he actually told me I was brave to share cause he have an incurable STD the never disclose to any one I have one more brother to tell which won't be easy.. Everyone is not as strong as I am telling people I know care about me it's more difficult emontionally for me.

I told my immediate family pretty much right away. And then slowly (within a month) told my more distant family members. And then I decided to tell everyone. I feel like it's nothing to be ashamed of, no matter how you got it. Sex is a normal, healthy part of life and relationships and sometimes things just happen... I know it's hard, but I hope that your family is supportive of you. If not, I'll always be a support!!