HIV Support Group
HIV (also known as human immunodeficiency virus, and formerly known as HTLV-III and lymphadenopathy-associated virus) is a retrovirus that primarily infects vital components of the human immune system which can lead the syndrome known as AIDS. Many of the problems faced by people infected with HIV result from failure of the immune system to protect from opportunistic...
I know how to have save sex, but I don't know how to have it anymore now that i'm HIV. I would like to know what I can and not do now in bed. I lost in the sex department now. Please help!!!!
Mary
Mary
Here goes. you can do anything that HIV neg people can do, so long as u provide a barrier between your bodily fluids and your partner. Lots of talk on how safe oral sex is. Im not even going to go into that minefield. I would suggest using the thicker condoms, although this isnt necessary if you're not too rough. Use a little lubrication on the inside tip of the condom (ie before u 'roll it on'. This will lower friction, and obviously if you use lubrication on yourself if needed :) This will also lower friction. I wouldnt recommend anal sex, however, this is personal choice. As for anything else im pretty sure you will get the hang of it. If you are having regular sex with a regular partner, monitor your Viral Load and consider starting medication earlier than usual to lower it to undetectable therefore decreasing the risk of transmission even further.
For the record, I do all the things that I did before HIV but with a condom. There is a certain lack of something, and sometimes the spontaneity is compromised, but all in all its still very good fun ;)
Take care and be safe
Im not going into oral sex. some say there is no risk, some say there is a small risk. something like 1 in 20,000. some say they arent sure. I dont know the answer, and im not going to risk putting what I believe up in these forums. My advice would be to look at the facts, and read some of the studies done on the subject. There are plenty of sources on the internet giving that information.
I have had plenty of sex, oral and otherwise with my husband and he still remains HIV-. It took a few years and a divorce for my husband to feel safe in our sexual relationship though.
Today, the only difference in our sex life is, that he wears a condom.
BE WELL.
I have done extensive research in the area of condoms, and thier usage. All latex condoms, regardless of thin,or ribbed, or the standard are run through rigorous testing for durability as well as barrier quality. It has been proven that HIV can NOT pass through Latex or Polyurethane......whats the difference?
Latex has just a fraction more of flexibility, and can only be properly used with a water based lubricant. Oil based lubricants will weaken the latex compounds resulting in breakage. Studies report latex does provide slightly more sensitivity to the male.
Polyurethane a little less flexible, but not much at all. Polyurethane condoms were developed for those who have allergic reactions to Latex.
As far as manufacturing, as I stated before all condoms, are required a rigorous minimum of testing before being released. However, those manufactured in Japan are run through a rigorous testing check, far exceeding the other countries that manufacture condoms. In Japan, condoms are produced in batches, each batch being assigned a lot number. They then go through and randomly pull condoms of the line, throughout the manufacturing of each batch, and ran through thier testing. If one fails their testing, they remove the whole lot number, melt the batch down,and start over.
as for correct condom use....here's my take on it:
Please keep in mind, there is also plenty of things besides penetrative sex, that can excite the mind, body and soul. But if it does get to the point of penetrative sex, please protect yourself. For example, you masturbating all over her chest.....is NO RISK. The skin is a great barrier to prevent hiv.
Do NOT use two condoms at once...doubling a condom can actually cause breakage, use one latex or polyurethane condom PROPERLY, and you will be 100% safe.
Again, I advise and recommend water based lubricants, simply because they are water soluable, latex/polyurethane friendly, and safely absorbed by the body.
Condoms manufactured in japan are actually the best, as they are ran through the most thorough inspections and tests, before being released to the public*
Also, MALE condoms are most affective all the way around, comfort, sensitivity, etc.
Be sure to pinch the tip of the condom,expelling the air-pocket out of the tip before you put the condom on, and roll it down over you. The most commen contributers to condom breakage are air pockets, lack of sufficiant amount of water based lubricants, or the combination of the two.
where does doubling condoms fall into the equation? doubling a condom provides airpockets both between : the two layers of condoms, and also between the first condom and your skin. doubling condoms, is comparable to russian roullette, you may get lucky a few times, but that luck wont last long....
In closing, never use an Oil-based/petroleum based lubricant in combination with a latex condom, as they will weaken and break down the latex compounds, inviting breakage, and drastically increases the chances of breakage*
Some will say condoms arent 100%, however studies have proven, that when used Correctly and Consistantly, condoms do have 100% rating. It's sad that they post the stats that factor in incorrect use, when determining reliabilty ratings*
and dont forget, YOUR RESPONSIBILITY does NOT end when the condom is rolled down, it only takes a fraction of a second to look and check to make sure the condom is staying in place,etc....
By all means, have a wonderful time together, but from being an aids survivor, i will
tell you, the best passion, laughter,LOVE, that one could give to ANYONE, especially hiv+ people....begins with the word Genuine*
One more important note, as humans we are prone to make mistakes, especially in the heat of the moment...because of this, if it's a sero-discordent relationship( where one person is HIV+ and the other is HIV-), i personally suggest you test for HIV ATLEAST once every 6 months, if not every 3 months to protect their negative status.
When removing a condom, be sure to hold the base of the condom to prevent any spillage of semen. DO NOT roll the condom back off yourself !
Use a fresh condom for each sexual act. Also for longer sexual escapades, I suggest you change the condom to a fresh one, every 30-40 mins.
copyright 2007 Cochise Cooper www.aids2hiv.com
www.aids2hiv.com
my hubby and I have been together for amost 12 years and we have one son who is 9 years old. My hubby is negative and thank god so is our son. We have always been careful and our son is still here and we are very thankful for him. Having sex with a person who is hiv- can be scary but most important; be honest with them and use the protection for both of you. I wish you happiness in your quest. I pray the lord sends the right person to you to give you the happiness you deserve.