Personally, it helps me to micromanage it. T hat might not be your style, but it's worth trying. I sit down before the thing I have to do and make a list of the things and situations that might make me uncomfortable in it. I break down the confrontations I will have and practice possible outcomes in my head. I imagine the worst possible scenario and then come up with a way out so that you have one if you need it. Then do the opposite. Try to think of the best possible outcome. Imagine that you are having a great time with what you have to do. Then think about ways you can put a positive spin on the uncomfortable parts. If you have to see a lot of people you don't want to see, focus on the ones you do like. Cling to the people in a group you think might understand or be sensitive to your needs. If there aren't any, perhaps you can look on it as an "at least". "At least I only have to see these people a few times a year", "at least I get to go home tomorrow", or "at least so and so is being kind to me". Know what you can handle. If I make a list like I mentioned, it lays out very plainly for me what I can and can't handle and I can plan how I react. If i need to be the person that leaves early, the person who steps away every couple minutes, or the person who is not very talkative, that's okay. It's hard to let go of caring about how people view you, but if you can, you can turn your focus to you and what you need. Taking care of yourself, not forcing uncomfortable situations, and taking the time you need to process, is most important. You can't always control a situation, but if you are good to yourself, you my be able to control how much you let it hurt you. I hope that helps. I struggle with very similar things. My approach is control as much as possible. Might not be your thing but worth trying.

I personally find guided meditations and positive affirmations work wonders for me. I find lots of free ones on youtube. I also highly recommend Rick Hanson's audio cd "Stress-proof Your Brain." He is excellent and his techniques are very calming for me.

So strange to me now, since I have come to understand that I am an HSP, how many things in my life were triggers for me and I never even realized it. I used to dive head-first into situations with high stimulation, only to come away with feeling awful in some way or another. I guess that is what happens when one is also a "stimulation seeker" as Elaine Aron, author of The Highly Sensitive Person in Love, puts it. I'm hoping I can learn to stop seeking the stimulation that ultimately stresses me out.

I hope you find an answer quickly, hun, so that you can feel calm and face that day with confidence.

I find that worrying about an event is worse than the actual event. I think the graduation will be a great event. My tendency is not to dwell on my worries and just face them.

I also want to add that the choice to go is yours alone. If things get so bad you are free not to do it.

My sister's husband gets very overstimulated at family parties like birthdays, Christmas, etc. He often will wear ear plugs even just around his house to help tolerate his own kids. (I need to adopt that practice!). It's not uncommon for him to stay with the family for only a little while and then go back off into another room by himself. I used to think that was very rude, but I completely understand him now.

Thank you so much for all of your suggestions! How wonderful not to be alone in this!

I have some meditations I use but will look into the You Tube ones as well.

Debi, I think you make a good point with the ear plugs and eli with the fact that I am ultimately in control of what I do. If it's going to be too intense, I can talk with my son and tell him that I'll put together a party for him (comfort zone) but not attend graduation.

And ATS, it makes sense to think through it, think of the worst case scenario and realize I can handle it. I will also visualize the BEST case scenario! : )

Thanks all!

I also agree that it's often worse in my mind than in reality!

I think the visualizing it as a great day would really help.

Understood. There are times I feel reluctant even to imagine what the scene gonna be.

So far several tricks helps --
1) Handle two mentally chanllenging tasks at one time. One might be horrifying, but two become a self challenge and the success will bring over the confidence for future.
2) Write down a plan/list/protocol or whatever that channels our time and energy onto actually solving the situation whilst keep our mind from thinking of too much possibilities.
3) Sufficient comfort and support. Food, herbal tea, favorite personal items, etc... treating ourself as the kid on the first day to his/her kindergarten. If they can survive that, so can we deal with our grown up stuff.

Just my 2 cents... Still took me courage cuting down worrying or dodging the problem and put these into act. We are not alone....

I find it helps to have a plan for each thing that concerns me, so I feel like I have some control. Like, for the part of it being an unfamiliar place, I would make the drive days before the event if you possibly can. Or at least viewing the street view on bing maps, and it will look more familiar to you on the actual day ... things like that really help.
I also tell myself that if I encounter a person who really gets my emotions rolling, I will know in advance where the restrooms are in case I need to make a quick exit for a stressful conversation. Saying I have an upset tummy can get me out of a lot of bad conversations LOL.
If the noise gets to you, plan to make frequent trips out to the lobby or restroom to take a break, or find a water fountain. Feeling in control/planning ahead really helps me. Good luck!

Thank you so much. I will ask about the venue and also find something I can do while there (spin a ring, count prayer beads, etc.) to take my mind off the anxiety. I just with everything was not such a huge production because of the sensitivity. Argh!