Healthy Sex Support Group

This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.

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veggiequeen 10/12/2018

That is the motto these days since you never know who was with whom . I missed out on alot... was a late bloomer, only with 3 men and untouched by hubby for the past 11 of 16 years. I have never been fortunate enough to find someone who is passionate... the kind that builds as you look into each others eyes... wandering hands,lips... heavy breathing.. peeling each thers clothes off... excitement building...

What I did enjoy the most (from what I can remember... lol) was feeling him explode inside of me. Also, I was never really on the receiving end of oral (Everyone does tell me what I have been missing... And I woud lve nthing more than to both give and receive.

I realize this may sound stupid, but I am clueless here... Need some info to make some sense.Safe sex is always condoms.... then oral is always a risk also isn't it? Are you telling me that everyone out there in the free world is having no oral unless they are in a very long term relationship?

All this frustration and tension has built up... but for what is the point??? Would appreciate any info to help me clarify this.Thanks.

gregsbaby 10/12/2018

You're not stupid. Yes oral is a risk because it is another form of sex. Personally I never did it unless I was in a LTR because I wasn't trying to get an STD, but hey that's me. When LH stepped out I made him go to PPH with me to make sure he was still clean, but again that's just me. I'm too damned old to catch something with no cure. Not trying to scare you or anything just be suuuper careful if/when you do. If you see signs of bumps/irritation/redness/open sores run like hell! I know there used to be something called a dental dam but I have no idea how they work.

soulsearcher83 10/15/2018

I was also just about to mention dental dams. They are a thin film that can be laid on top of the vagina and then someone can perform oral on you with the film as a barrier. I have never used them but I know I probably should.

I use condoms every time. And I'm on bc but that's mostly for horrendous periods.

You can go to a women's clinic or your doctor and get more info. Dental dames and condoms can be purchased in stores but finding dental dams is harder to find in brick and mortar retailers. Your best bet is at a clinic that screens for std's or to buy them online.

Only celibacy keeps you 100% safe and not many people are willing to do that. I know I'm not. I'm single. I meet guys and have sex but always with condoms. No condom, no sex. It's non negotiable with me.

Get tested regularly. Not sure how often it is recommended to be tested but if you are sexually active with more than one person, probably every few months. Probably less in a committed monogamous relationship or monogamous marriage but everyone should be tested from time to time.

veggiequeen 10/15/2018

All of this really can kill the mood. :(

Nelsontheone 10/15/2018

Don't let it overwhelm you - just take your time and wait for the guy who is willing to be careful and patient as well. It will pay off and you will be glad you did!

art4life19 10/16/2018

yeah good post. i practice safe sex by using condoms. I don't sleep with a bunch of people i don't know either but If I am with someone and want to have sex with them i talk to them first and ask them if they have any STD's that I should know about. I only have sex with someone that I trust. My motto is if I don't trust you I have no business having sex with you. I don't have any STD's and would like to keep it that way. It is a risk to take to have oral sex. I take the risk because i love it! You do have to be careful though. You can ask someone to get tested before you have sex with them. If they say no you can chose not to have sex with them.

veggiequeen 10/16/2018

@ art4life--- there it is. All tell me what I am missing.. I think I would venture to take that risk as well (with some serious questioning first of course) to just have that chance to experience firsthand.

koolman 10/17/2018

Everything in life IS a risk, but of course we shouldn't throw our lives away on a whim, because we've got some particular fetish, i.e. in your case the incredible feeling of a man blowing his load inside you. Certain sacrifices have to be made, i.e. condoms, in favor of survival. You could always enjoy the VISUAL effect, of SEEING the sperm, cream, jizz, spunk, shoot out during a handjob, forming a nice lather on your hand, which can still be incredibly erotic, especially if he blows it 3 feet in the air like a fire hydrant!

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