Healthy Sex Support Group
This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.
so... something that i know happens, but i have never understood. And before i go on, i will explain a few things that i do understand. The s/o changing over time, after the relationship and feelings are set... but the women (and men) that start dating someone, and this person from the get-go(within a couple of months) is abusive... why do they stay with them? The emotions are not set yet, and the ability to get out is still there... so... why?
The reason this is so confusing to me, is that at one point i did get into an abusive relationship with someone(she was mentally and emotionally abusive to me)... and it started very quickly. Like, at the month mark these tendencies started, and by the time it got to 3 months, i was completely miserable, realized what was going on, and left... and maybe i am being unfair because i did get out... and no, i am not accusing anyone at all. i am just curious... so... anyone?
The reason this is so confusing to me, is that at one point i did get into an abusive relationship with someone(she was mentally and emotionally abusive to me)... and it started very quickly. Like, at the month mark these tendencies started, and by the time it got to 3 months, i was completely miserable, realized what was going on, and left... and maybe i am being unfair because i did get out... and no, i am not accusing anyone at all. i am just curious... so... anyone?
jimmysquirrel
oops... worng forum everyone!!! ignore it here... and any moderators... feel free to remove this! if anyone here does want to tackle it, it is going to be on the abuse board... my bad... sorry
deleted_user
becasue they think this is a good as they can get!!
deleted_user
most believe that they deserve it. those in abusive situations usually came from one.
deleted_user
Robicrow is very right...i was raised with a mother that was very emotionally abusive towards myself, sister, and father. To this day she still is, but when i found my husband 12 1/2yrs ago i found a man that would treat me the same way as my mother did for all those years. My husband filled her role quite quickly, and to this day my husband can still be quite emotionally abusive. But i do believe that cause i was raised with it, and i sought out someone who was like my mother that i fully deserve to be treated like that. And i'm still treated like that
deleted_user
I think there are alot of reasons... some of which might be fear. Fear of being alone, making it alone again, How to manage kids by themselves, I have heard the persons religion play a major part... I think if you cant admit "I grew up that way so I think I deserve it then deep down you must know better' It might be what you are used to and dont know how to break the cycle, but do you really think you deserve it if you can verbalize that??? Just a question....
deleted_user
probably what she/he grew up with - its a "safety zone" in many ways - although outsiders know better. her/his mother endured it. he/she watched it and lived it their whole lives. he/she probably doesnt even realize!! could be a million reasons
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