Healthy Sex Support Group

This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.

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HeaveToo 02/19/2009

I have only been with 3 women. This is because I have spent most of my life in long term relationships (last was 7 years of marriage).

Shortly after my marriage I was very drunk and I ended up hooking up with a co-worker. Yeah, bad thing. Oh well, not a problem now as I am not working there now.

One thing that I have noticed that everytime I was with a new partner I had a hard time having an orgasm. Not sure why this happens. With the girl that I had a one night stand with I went for two hours straight and I just couldn't get over the edge to do that. Same thing with my ex wife and the girl that I was dating before that. It takes a few times before I can orgasm with someone.

I don't have a hard time getting turned on at all and I have no problem performing for her, but I find it fustrating that I can't orgasm.

Anyone know why this might happen?

deleted_user 02/19/2009

only reason i would think it is because its a new person and ul need time to get to no this person and be perfectly comforable..
maybe your just to consious of how your performing for this person and satisfying their needs before yours. after awhile ull just be comfortable enough to relax completly. its what it sounds like when you say it has been like this with past partners!!! xxxx

Goof 02/19/2009

I think its all in your head...and NOT the one you are using to have sex with....

there's something holding you back...that keeps you from fully letting go....

then again...it could be something else....

HeaveToo 02/19/2009

I would say why this probably has a lot to due with the fact that I dislike one night stands. Then again, I am not going to really bitch about it because it makes the second time much more rewarding for myself and the other person.

deleted_user 02/19/2009

Stress. You are also the type that doesn't just fuck for fun. You need the emotional attachment. Nothing wrong with it, admirable really.

suzyhopes 02/20/2009

You're not alone. I have had the same issue in the past. I totally think its about comfort level. I worry too much about the other person and what they're thinking and can't focus on my feelings. I try not to worry, but I've really got no advice for you, just wanted you to know you're not alone!

deleted_user 02/20/2009

Without really knowing a little about someone it's hard for me to get into the orgasm thing too..well so far in my life anyway.....

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