He needs therapy of some nature because at this point his actions sound nearly dangerous to others beyond the pressure cooker building up till he explodes. If you ask an attorney he would be charged with rape and sodomy. The nature of any sexual activity is giving ones trust at the deepest most intimate level as possible.

"angry and irrational" is a warning sign from the third-party perspective. What do you want to do about it? Do you feel unsafe to the point where you should leave? If so, then you should.

If you do not want to leave, then you may need third-party help. Issues around sexual frustration (e.g., ED or a woman's difficulty letting go enough for an orgasm) don't often fix themselves over time.

Ghostdancer did I miss something? I saw no reference to her being forced to do anything and especially not sodomy?

Your BF is a very selfish individual for expecting you to do things of such and especially if you get nothing in return. First he needs medical help for his ED issue and second he needs mental help and therapy for his demanding nature and treating you the way he does. There many things out there to help with ED these days and since I don't know his age or medical history I cant really comment any further. His behavior is abusive though and you need to realize that and see what you are truly in for here. Anyone that that makes demands upon you does not love you.

Best of luck!

Yeah I didn't either... however has he agreed to go to the doctor? Everything would come to a screeching hault until he got checked and tried medication. My H has occasional ED.. guess what he doesn't have a problem because he takes medication