Healthy Sex Support Group
This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.
...and now my situation has gone from bad to worse :(
I haven't had sex with my husband in well over a year, maybe longer ...and I really do miss it...He's an addict and we have a very strained relationship...but in the end...I still love him...want him...and miss him.
I had been ok for a while because I was focused on other things in an effort to forget about our problems (my first mistake, i guess) but it's gotten harder this last week...we were forced to be home together for 4 days and on the 3rd day we had a huge fight...and ended up back where we started.. which is really nowhere...he shuts down completely when things don't go his way...and I think that is what hurts me the most...I am not that way...I can be mad at you one minute and laughing and joking with you the next...but not him...he get upset and he pushes me away and won't speak to me for days...and I...I just feel so alone....then the other day, the 4th actually...I got a whiff of him after he got out of the shower...well...that was all I needed to remind me of what it used to be like...when he left I went to the bathroom and masturbated-AGAIN!...I fantasize about how it used to be and I want it to be that again...but it just isn't happening...I miss him and IT so much...I just don't know what to do anymore.
I am just so fucking horny
DR
I haven't had sex with my husband in well over a year, maybe longer ...and I really do miss it...He's an addict and we have a very strained relationship...but in the end...I still love him...want him...and miss him.
I had been ok for a while because I was focused on other things in an effort to forget about our problems (my first mistake, i guess) but it's gotten harder this last week...we were forced to be home together for 4 days and on the 3rd day we had a huge fight...and ended up back where we started.. which is really nowhere...he shuts down completely when things don't go his way...and I think that is what hurts me the most...I am not that way...I can be mad at you one minute and laughing and joking with you the next...but not him...he get upset and he pushes me away and won't speak to me for days...and I...I just feel so alone....then the other day, the 4th actually...I got a whiff of him after he got out of the shower...well...that was all I needed to remind me of what it used to be like...when he left I went to the bathroom and masturbated-AGAIN!...I fantasize about how it used to be and I want it to be that again...but it just isn't happening...I miss him and IT so much...I just don't know what to do anymore.
I am just so fucking horny
DR
Sounds like a very difficult relationship situation. If your husband is an addict, I 'm pretty sure that is probably the main problem here that needs to be addressed. When someone is addicted to substances they stop acting like themselves, and they start to focus mostly on the addiction. This makes all other people and things in their lives take a back seat. It's no way to be in a relationship.
Hopefully your husband can realize he needs to get help for it as soon as possible. You can suggest help, but no one can do it for him - only he can fix himself.
Unfortunately, you may also need to ask yourself if you can even accept a relationship like this? Difficult issues for sure - but you have to ask yourself if you want your life to continue to be like this?
Very sorry to hear, and best of luck with it!
If he refuses help to fix his problems, it might be time for you to decide if you can continue in this relationship.