Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
My whole life has decided to go against me that past few months. From getting a major car accident where I should have died to my fiancee breaking up with me later to my family hating me because I still love my ex to my process of applying for graduate school is going wrong.
I am at a really low point. I went and saw therapy but she just told me all these things that are meant for me, to work on myself. What about everyone and everything else around me that isn't right? How can I be the only healthy/right one. I don't live alone. I can't stop people from being mad at me or thinking I'm just a shitty person. No one understands the pain within me.
I have yet to see a healthy relationship between any 2 people around me. Everyone has issues and everyone expects you to treat them great but nobody treats me that way. I want to live in a world where people treat me as good as I treat them. Where friends are real friends and love is real and family will be there giving you positive support no matter what.
I feel like my whole life is a nightmare and sadly even when I sleep, I have nightmares. I just want one good thing to happen!!!
I am at a really low point. I went and saw therapy but she just told me all these things that are meant for me, to work on myself. What about everyone and everything else around me that isn't right? How can I be the only healthy/right one. I don't live alone. I can't stop people from being mad at me or thinking I'm just a shitty person. No one understands the pain within me.
I have yet to see a healthy relationship between any 2 people around me. Everyone has issues and everyone expects you to treat them great but nobody treats me that way. I want to live in a world where people treat me as good as I treat them. Where friends are real friends and love is real and family will be there giving you positive support no matter what.
I feel like my whole life is a nightmare and sadly even when I sleep, I have nightmares. I just want one good thing to happen!!!
At that time, my life also fell apart - I lost my body as I knew it, I lost my bf and I lost my job as a result of Injuries.
So.. Here is the deal : I think you are trying to put out too many fires all at once and it is tearing you in every direction. Your number one priority is to recover from the accident mentally and physically, before you try to figure out relationships with your family and your ex or someone new. You have to be able to get to stand on your own two feet before you move on to the next task.
Stop discussing your love and grief for the fiance with your family because they can not help you. Right now they are there for only one purpose - a place to sleep and get your crap together.
Keep going to therapy and your therapist is right. All this , as crazy as it sound, had a benefit because if you do this right, you will find a hole different life and outlook on life.
Before I had this accident, I have experienced many losses, but none of them could compare to this experience. Like you, I used to get upset over guys and my relatives..
None of that bothers me now and I feel like a new person. My bf actually came back to me and we are enganged .. This relationship is not without problems, but there is a major component - I no longer have any fear or anxiety over losing what I have, because I KNOW that I can rebuild, regenerate and have what I want again.
The man I am with knows that I can hold my own and I am not hovering over him anxiously as I was before. I am not trying too hard.
I am trying just right, just enough to show love while I expect respect for who I am.
As for family - if these people are poisoning your life, get away from
Them ASAP .
You CAN have a healthy relationship with someone.
Basically in a good relationship your life is complemented, not complicated by the guy you are with. That's all.
I wish you all the best.
Keep your head up, take Xanax, breathe in a paper bag and do not slow down.
I have faith in God. i pray every day. i pray for things to get better, i pray for support, I pray for anything that can keep me going.
I tried to go back to work but I don't have someone to take me and bring me home. I need to get a car and I'm really scared to get back on the road and i would need to pay for my car insurance and eventually I would need to quit the job to go to school which is going wrong as well.
I applied for the wrong major and now I can't remember if i sent the needed requirements and there are deadlines and i tend to forget a LOT.
My ex was very supportive through the accident. He stayed with me in the hospital and drove 3 hours each way to see me every weekend. It just all fell apart after when we both got too overwhelmed with trying to plan a wedding which was a mistake because there was too much going on.
I can sit here and go on and on.. I do think about everything that went wrong and how it could have been avoided and how to not repeat those mistakes again. But more stuff keep falling apart. And I just can't anymore.
My favorite time is when i go to sleep because i don't feel anything and nothing can go wrong. I think I am depressed.
One step at a time. You are not the same now. Relearn first.
Good luck. Hope everything works out for you.
I physically exercise. Having a REALLY strong body helps me have a strong mind and soul, and helps me deal with whatever external crap life throws at me.
If I was you I would only highlight the positives in life, and never the negatives, and sure to get well quick smart you will. Become nonjudgmental, and believe me you; you will be positively rewarded for it guaranteed.