Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
I have NEVER had a healthy relationship. Ever. My parents, my siblings, my partners, my former spouse, my current partner... none of it.
My parents are absolutely not supportive. I got divorced a year and a half ago and I feel like my ex got my family in the divorce. My mom just reshared my ex's wedding pictures with his new wife with a caption of "wow we have so many grandkids, I just love them all" - like, really mom? The guy who cheated on and abused your daughter? Those stepkids are your grandkids now?
My brothers and I have non-existent relationships. Barely know them. We did hardly anything together growing up and don't spend time together as adults.
My ex husband had me in what is essentially a cult, so when I left I lost any friends I had. I have nobody.
I have no friends, no family. I'm dating someone who is generally a great guy but he is so aggressive about things and just wants to cut everyone off like it's nothing. My teenager's have moved out of our house because they don't like him. He is very black and white and blunt and rude. My kids have never dealt with anything like that and they'd rather be at their dads. What if I lose my younger children too? It feel inevitable.
I am financially dependent on him now. I pay half and so does he, but I can't afford 100% of rent plus bills. I will lose my house and my kids if we split up. He would be fine, he makes almost twice what I do and has less than half the kids I do.
I am done with life. I have nothing and nobody. What if I just leave this world and let them all go on without me? I contribute nothing. I'm not helping. Nobody wants me. I quit. I think I finally fucking quit. What is the point anymore? What am I working so hard for? My kids don't want me, my parents don't want me, my partner doesn't want me. I have no purpose.
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Ever since I stopped doing therapy because of insurance, I've been feeling that old tense and irritable sense of anxiety and stress. I hate that. I was making so many strides and changes during therapy, my therapist would acknowledge all of my progress and accomplishments, and I miss that reassurance. Today I thought about it, and I made those changes! She would always tell me that I chose to...
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
It's hard to do, but just try to sit quietly, with some nice music, maybe candle and write out Your Positive Qualities.
Not easy, but you ran a household, were married until abuse and you were brave enough to Get Out so
You Are A Survivor and A Brave Woman!!
Please block the negative and think Solution Based ideas to move forward.
Your current partner wants you to cut everyone off...Red Flag Huge!
You could contact your local social service dept and find out what you are able to receive based on your income. Does your x pay child support?
Perhaps polish up your resume and seek out a better paying job.
You are Worthy and Have Purpose just because you are alive!!!
Hugs <3
I agree with ml.... Right now you're overwhelmed and catastrophizing... It can make life seem so bleak
Maybe try and focus on one day at a time
If this is your home and you need help with rent you can always have this man leave and gain a roommate.... Check them out first
It might just be a great alternative ... Things are so expensive now people are sharing space
You deserve to be treated well and with respect
Gentle hug while you sort things out one day, one hour, one moment at a time.... xo
Your kids don’t like this new man and seems like he’s convenient for you rather than a good man with a good personality who wants to father your kids not just share a bed with their mom. I think I hear some depression and very negative thinking, catastrophizing. You deserve to treat yourself better.
Your family sounds like narcissistic family dynamics. My husband’s family is this same way as you describe. He had good counseling which showed him he was not the problem and he could move forward in healthy ways. Become a new man so to speak.
You are attracted to men who don’t value you. I’ve read we try to work out issues from our childhood like this with new adult partners. If you can make a man value you and love you, perhaps inside you is the notion you will then have value and worth. I’m here to say you have value and worth now as a human being. Whether or not all these dysfunctional people recognize it. You’ve got to find it within yourself. Get rid of the bad men and focus on helping yourself so you model healthy to your younger kids. They need healthy and functional. You matter!
Stay off social media with all these terrible people. Be self protective!
You need to create a plan. You need to figure out how to afford living on your own or even getting a roommate. Because relying on a man is how you get trapped with abusers. Your boyfriend has to go.