Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
I am so confused right now and just need help. I became friend with this guy who I am older than, but it was just friendship so I had no problem. Anyway, I have not had a boyfriend for the past 7 years and I think I am so vulnerable, so this guy started talking about sex and I was not interested in that with him because I really don't know him, but I wanted to help him out, so I learn how to jerk him off with my hands and I did that 4 different days already. Anyway, I know I was doing something wrong, but I just thought I am helping him out, anyway, it happen that he rubbed and suck my breast and we almost had sex, but we didn't. He gets to insert is fingers in my vagina but not his penis, anyway, I almost went all the way with him but he couldn't get it back up. After that day, I noticed he doesn't call, text or even talk to me at all. I try calling him and he got his friends to answer the phone, so I think he is avoiding him. Now I feel like a slut and even concern about why he hasn't reached out to me. The truth is, I am bad because I think I helped him out and he really hasn't done much for me, and now he is avoiding me. All of what happened is not something I am accustom to do, and that is why I am alone for over 7 years now because I guard my heart. I am not really physically attracted to him but I think I like how he makes me feel and hence I am doing things I am not accustomed to doing. I really love communicating on the phone but he is just avoiding me, it really makes me feel bad and now like I am going out of my mind. I am not a stalker or an obsessive person, but I know where he lives and I even thought of going there and wait on him, but another part of me said now, because if he is not talking to me on the phone, it is a fair chance he doesn't want to see me in person. Help, please? Thank you guys.
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
I think you need to relax and feel more comfortable with what you really want. If casual sex is not comfortable to you and you feel it attaches you to people, don't engage in any form of it until you are sure that is what you really want with that person.
That concerns me.
You're intimate with someone to help them out?
You were used, and it concerns me that you allowed it.
You should figure out why you're behavior was what it was.
It's not the casual sex, its the reason you say you engaged in this.
And if you're not mature enough to handle a one night stand, where the other party may not want to bothered afterward, don't engage in it.
And for heaven's sake don't go near his home, job or school.
Lose his number and move on.
Thank you so much for your suggestion. First let me say I have spoken to the person and he was ashamed of his inadequacy and being incompetent. So I am now in a good place, I think I just needed the conversation to know what was going on. Also, I wouldn't have gone to his home or job because I am not really crazy like that, but I just wanted an answer, so I meet with him and we had a very long conversation, so I am in a better place now. But thank you so much for your suggestion. Also, I should point out that I am not into casual sex or one night stand, I think I just got caught up in the moment and my emotion got the best of me, but I am very good now. Thanks for all the suggestions.
Thank you so much for your suggestions. I am not into casual sex, I think I got caught up in the moment but I am in a much better place now. I also mentioned that I felt like a slut, because I have never done any of these things with a guy before, furthermore I do not know that person long enough, so I really felt bad about me even touching his penis (which is really small). Anyway, I just needed closer from him and I got that so I am in a much better place. Thanks for everything.
Thank you so much for your suggestions. I am no longer a college student but my behavior was not very mature, and that is because I got caught up in emotions because I have blood running thru my vein and I was in a vulnerable place, but I am much better now. I totally find myself doing things I have never done and never thought I would have ever done, and believe me I am ashamed of myself for it. But I am only human and we make mistakes and we just have to move on from them, and this is one of my mistakes. Anyway, I didn't have sexual intercourse with this person and I know realized how childish and immature he really is, so I am so grateful how things worked out, so I am in a much better place now and I have moved on. I think I really needed closure and I got that, so I was able to move on without many regrets. Anyway, thanks so much.
https://www.dailystrength.org/group/healthy-sex/discussion/healthy-sex-support-gro_1