Healthy Relationships Support Group

No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.

9,961 Members

13,641 Posts

1 Online

stickyhoneybeez 05/28/2016

I've been with my bf for almost 5 years. Throughout the time we have become interdependent, but steadily unhappy, as our communication has turned into daily arguing...and I mean DAILY. Respect seems to have flown out the window and my trust has disappeared because he keeps promising to change and that the relationship will be better (obviously I am not believing this). Passion gone. There's nothing left besides broken dreams and "hope". We have finally started couples therapy with the hope (or my hope of rekindling and having a healthy relationship).

I feel miserable and unhappy and he is aware though I don't know if he is completely denying it or doesn't care. I am worried that this is the end. I am not even sure if I still love him, which scares me the most.

What's worst is that we moved back to my home state to be closer to my family after being done with school. He is now far from his home and if this is the end...I made him move for nothing.

I am lost and scared.

Thanks for listening.

rising-star 05/28/2016

Why are you still with him remind me?

Look, it's not going to be easy, but you'll just have to suck it up and make a decision. It's quite clear what that decision is going to be. No sense in being unhappy, is there.

SunCloudJD 05/29/2016

Hi and Welcome sticky!

If you are in couples therapy I would try and clear my mind as much as you can and invest yourself in it... If you don't feel any different after some time I would bring up ending the relationship for both of your sakes

You both deserve a happy and peaceful life... There is a lot to be said for peace of mind.... Big hug...xo

texicallie 05/29/2016

You mention changes that he keeps promising to make.

Are there any changes you may need to make yourself for the betterment of the relationship?

clearskye 05/30/2016

sometimes I think the "not knowing" is a clear answer... it's just fear that holds us from taking a leap into the unknown... be sure you are true to yourself and are being genuine in your intentions with the couples therapy... also, no guilt about him moving... you didn't "make him" do anything! ... best wishes that you find clarity soon

rmb 05/30/2016

Unless you pressured him or him into moving, that decision is made as a couple so don't beat yourself up over that.

Sometimes incorporating individual counseling can help you get some clartity around your feelings.

I will say with any type of counseling, sometimes at first, it's very unsettling and it feels like things almost get worse. It kicks up a lot of stuff and really make you feel really upset and scared.

LindaMarie8289 05/30/2016

In reading your post, my outside observation was that you said nothing at all about what you liked about your boyfriend, nor your relationship with him. My questions to you would be...at this point (and after approximately five long years of being boyfriend/girlfriend), what do you LIKE about your relationship and what do you LIKE about your boyfriend? What makes you feel great, stable, secure and healthy about your relationship and being with your boyfriend? And, looking very honestly at your answers to those questions, then ask yourself if those "likes" and other answers are enough to sustain you to have a happy, healthy, secure and truly loving relationship for the rest of your lives together. If you are contemplating marriage or a life-long commitment with your boyfriend, it's good that you look at these things upfront, because if you're not feeling happiness, true love, security, stableness and healthiness before a marriage or life partnership with someone, you will definitely not feel any of these things after marrying them either.

Join the Conversation

Posts You May Be Interested In

Hello Monday

Posted by: SunCloudJD

Last Reply: SunCloudJD 08/10/2026

4

Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
Dr. Appointment

Posted by: Sunshinegirl0228

Last Reply: Sunshinegirl0228 08/10/2026

3

Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.

Hello Monday

Dr. Appointment