Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
i have been in a serious relationship with this man, for just over one year now, we had actualy moved in together,and got engaged. but as the past 6 months of the relationship things have gone from bad to worse, he had alot of debt that he had not told me about, finance for a car, unpaid bills ect... he strated making excuses about not being able to pay his share into the apartment that we live in, he is very stupid with money no sense of responability, he lets me pay for everything. so i was struggling so he decided to move out and go back to his parents house as i was literaly keeping him, and could not.he took all of his clothes with him everything including gifts. and we did actualy break up for about 4days /almost a week and we started to talk again, and he came back to the flat,and was staying over casualy. now he stays over for few days at a time,he is currently unemployed and has little money for petrol expenses, so he has to borrow frm family/ me . everytime he nows comes to the house i f we go out for drink i end up paying always. he takes over my computer, hardly speaks to me only when he has to. he used to kiss me hold me all the time, tell me he loves me . now has stoped.he is angry and disctracted all the time.i have asked him several times, if there is someone else and he says i am being stuipd. i feel so very used and taken advantage of...........advice is needed fast.
If you want my honest opinion, if a person is lying, can not hold up to his commitments and has behavioral problems in the very beginiing of your relationship it is unlikely that it's going to get better.
People do struggle at different times of their lives due to some personal unresloved issues and sounds like he is doing just that.
It is up to you to figure out if you are willing to deal with it, live with it and help him through it ( if , of course, there is potential for him to change).
Actions speak louder than words and according to you his actions are not very good.
Please, think about this carefully, before you give your life to this man.
I think you deserve better.
I'm not saying to move on simply because he is facing a hard time financially..we all go through that at times, but to be treated that way is to be disrespected and that is not to be tolerated.
If you feel you are being taken advantage of and used, your intuition is telling you something that you need to listen to NOW other then continuing on and enduring more of this.
Good luck!!!!!
i see where you are coming from because my fiance has a lot of debt too. i have been helping him out to take some stress form him and also so we can start saving for our wedding. This week I put him on the spot and he admitted he took out a loan, hocked some things all so he could blow it on gambling.
In saying that you have to do what is right for you. If you feel that you have done all you can and more and he is not even willing to meet you halfway then ask yourself if its worth it.
If you want to talk to me feel free to send me a message... I wish you the best! :)