Healthy Relationships Support Group

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"Love means..."

koolman
koolman
"...never having to say you're sorry."

The famous tag-line from the 1970 movie Love Story, starring Ryan O'Neil and Allie McGraw, got me thinking about its true meaning.

Does this mean love means we'll never hurt each other so we never have to say we're sorry? Then, as we all know, that is not the case. We DO hurt each other. Maybe we don't mean to, or maybe we do mean to, but it happens. Therefore, love means sometimes we DO need to say we're sorry.

Opines?
deleted_user
deleted_user
Yes it does
koolman
koolman
Then I guess none of us here have ever been in love...for very long... because we've all hurt someone, or they've hurt us, or both.

But it's a nice goal to aspire to, or, shall I say, settle into.

Thanks.
debmitchell
debmitchell
Lol yeah, never really understood that one. My husband and I, I don't think a day passes that doesn't see each of us say a quick, "sorry, honey!" for one thing or another. 99 times out of a hundred, the one being apologized to doesn't even think it's called for, but it's basic courtesy.

And that one time in a hundred... well, we're all flawed human beings. We hurt each other, whether or not we want to. Love means it hurts you when you hurt the one you love. You apologize, and you do everything you can to make sure you never hurt them that way again.

I think love means HAVING to say you're sorry - as in, when you hurt the one you love (and you will), it goes against everything you are NOT to apologize, and do everything you can to fix it.

Wonder if that makes sense to anyone else...
koolman
koolman
Yep!!! Thank you!!!
deleted_user
deleted_user
For me, someone can say they are sorry all they want for hurting you. I've heard it a million times in my past. I would rather have them show me so I know they mean it. The "I'm sorry you had a bad day" (along with a hug) is always nice though.
debmitchell
debmitchell
Lol yeah, like I say, apologize and fix it. Saying "sorry" is important, though. WHEN YOU MEAN IT, it means, "it hurts me that I hurt you like that. I take responsibility for what I did, I want to make it right, and I'll try to make sure it never happens again." It means alot more than someone using it to mean, "okay, I'll throw you a bone and say what you want to hear. Please shut up about it now." "I'm sorry" shouldn't be the end of it, it should be the beginning.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I think in any relationship sorry will be used, unless of course you're oblivious to others' feelings.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Yea....I spilled coffee on my boyfriend this morning :S - hot dunkin donuts coffee. And apologized PROFUSELY! He of course just laughed and gave me hug. But it is courtesy.
deleted_user
deleted_user
on a serious note, yes, love means forgiveness.

For me: on a different type of serious note. love means, soy pumpkin spice latte from starbucks.
deleted_user
deleted_user
My opinion is it's a movie. Pop culture usually isn't a good place to look for rules on how to conduct yourself.
deleted_user
deleted_user
In a "fake" love or real one, we as individuals, if want to make person feel better, say, I am sorry, regardless of big hurt or just tiny. Apology goes a long way.