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Well the hubby will be home next week and through into the month of January. He's not usually home for more than 4-5 days at a time except Christmas when he's often home for 2 weeks. This time we are looking at 4-5 weeks as he's having minor surgery.
I'm happy he's having the surgery he needs and the recovery time. Last time he had similar surgery he wasn't able to have the proper recovery time. He's coming home a bit early because he had to quit smoking or they won't put him out. I don't know how he plans to go cold turkey in a week when he easily smokes 2 packs a day but I will help him any way I can.
I will be working full time still while he's home and I don't get any time off at Christmas except my normal 2 days off a week. I'm used to having my space, having things clean and tidy. Before he went back to truck driving he was home each night so I know how that is, but it's been a long time since then. How can I just learn to eat my words and go with the flow? I know during this time he have dinner for me when he can and help with the housework but I really need to not let the clutter get to me and how messy the kitchen is when he cooks.
Anyone else have experience with spouses or SO's who work out of town? We are in a good place and this could be really good for us as long as I don't get all obsessive with my clean freakness lol
I'm happy he's having the surgery he needs and the recovery time. Last time he had similar surgery he wasn't able to have the proper recovery time. He's coming home a bit early because he had to quit smoking or they won't put him out. I don't know how he plans to go cold turkey in a week when he easily smokes 2 packs a day but I will help him any way I can.
I will be working full time still while he's home and I don't get any time off at Christmas except my normal 2 days off a week. I'm used to having my space, having things clean and tidy. Before he went back to truck driving he was home each night so I know how that is, but it's been a long time since then. How can I just learn to eat my words and go with the flow? I know during this time he have dinner for me when he can and help with the housework but I really need to not let the clutter get to me and how messy the kitchen is when he cooks.
Anyone else have experience with spouses or SO's who work out of town? We are in a good place and this could be really good for us as long as I don't get all obsessive with my clean freakness lol
If it were me, I'd suck it up, the situation of the messes are only temporarily (while he's home on leave-for his surgery). And then he'll be back to work again.
Also, not sure what type of surgery your H is having, but there is only so much he can do for himself, cooking/ cleaning/ getting out of the house (if he can't drive, he's going to want/ need to get out of the house some of the time), expect this. When I cared for my parents, they were bed-ridden, and had a bell they could ring when they needed something (food, toiletry needs, whatever).
As for you working at home, I don't know how big your place is, but is there a (quiet) space you can designate only to yourself/ door closed (while you work, uninterrupted?). If you H is not able to get about much, he may watch tv alot (which can be loud and distracting).
Other than that, I'd try and plan some activities, just for yourself (with friends, whatever), to give yourself a break from the caregiving. Make sure to get out at least once a week (twice better). If your H needs someone to be there with him while you're out and about, line up who can help.
As for quitting smoking, before surgery, not sure what to advise there. Two pack a week, will be hard to go cold turkey, he'll likely be grumpy. If it were me, I'd keep things calm, lay low, get out of the house. as much as my job affords If he can't do it,can't quit, it's his body, I wouldn't bug him about it.
I'm sure you'll do fine, provided, you give yourself breaks, from time to time, and keep your expectation of your H realistic (he's not going to feel like doing much after surgery). Cut him and yourself some slack!
as my first post said, if you're working full-time (at home), do what you can to have you're own quiet space (where you can work, semi-uninterrupted).
When you look at any mess he has created, tell yourself " That is the product of having my hubby! Try to look on any mess he makes as the very small price to pay for having all the good things he provides by being in your life.
Look at your calendar and look at a date that he will be back to work and you'll have time to do a clean freak loving deep cleaning! Tell yourself you will do mini tidy ups while he is there, but vow to just relax and look on all messes with love! lol
oh, and buy wine. lots and lots of wine! ha ha