Big hug Scotty..... I'm sorry that you've been hurt.....xo

Be patient with the healing process, Scotty. A couple months out of a 12 year relationship is not very much time.

Gentle support while you ride it out. Hope healing happens here.

Hugs Scotty. I am recently divorced after a 17 year marriage and my first boyfriend after my divorce was abusive so I hear where you coming from.

Both of my exes have moved onto new relationships and I am stuck. Doesn't seem fair as I consider myself a good person. As they say, life isn't fair.

I am trying to embrace this single thing but I don't like it. I am learning some much needed lessons about patience so I don't repeat my old mistakes.

Hang in there my friend. It does get better

@ifinallygetit

Without hi-jacking this thread, I agree it is important to embrace being on one's own after a breakup. It is difficult to be comfortable in a relationship with another person when one isn't fully comfortable being with one's self. If we don't ro this, we are just bringing all the old crap on to a new relationship.

Kinda like not getting rid of years worth of accumulated clutter when moving to a new place. Nice new, sparkling environment - same old crap and clutter mucking up the place.

Just don't isolate yourself. Get back to normal and hang with friends. Accept what happened and why. I know it is awkward to be third wheel but do you have any couples friends you can hang out with for awhile? After a few months maybe sign up for a match service? Lots of organizations have singles mixers and socials. Just don't go looking for someone to unload all your troubles on. That's what support groups and therapy are for. Dating is for fun. Also this is not a dating site.
Just try to go out and find things to do and get to normal. Don't let one person have so much control over your life again. It will get better.

im leaving those meeting services alone been catfished to many times and robbed 3 times from couples making fake profiles..... i know this is not a dating site and no one has control im over that part it finding someone i can trust and ways to over come that and for friends lol i dont talk to anyone cause they'er either dead or in jail. ive been isolated for years, long story but i may have posted about it if not i will tonight for sure. i posted this for people in the place i am and also for advice. im on here to make friends and meet understanding people and all i get is msgs about asking me if i want to video chat live and they home alone and bored....bump that if someone is in that low of a spot for attention they not getting it for more plus i grew out all that kiddie shit when i was a teen. but thanks for all the support and advice and words of wisdom from all . this post is not towards anyone just putting that out there so people dont mistake it for something that its not

I understand your discouragement. It's hard to find but worth the wait so don't give up! Can I suggest a meetup.com group? I think they're everywhere. They have all kinds of groups, running, dog walking, painting, learning a language, then you can meet people without any pressure and see if a friendship builds first. Take your time to get know people so you can be sure of their character before jumping in. Hoping the best for you!

I've heard MeetUp's are great as well..... They aren't dating sites …..

They're places for likeminded people to meet up for different reasons..... it could be from dancing or bowling to simply coffee and conversation in a group setting like jaynib wrote

It could even be support for a specific illness or disorder

There are a lot..... I know someone on here that was part of one and liked it.... I'm not sure if he still is or not but his was just a coffee circle once a week

yea i dont think just anyone is gonna meet up with me lol look at me i look lke a gang banging thug which ive never been in a gang just saying but the way the world is today i just dont see that happening. idk maybe its just me but thats kinda why i dont do those things and where i leave this city isnt know for to much good lately. Fears of different things and avoiding a bad thing or getting accused of something like i did last year andalmost got 15-25 yrs in prison for something i didnt do and had to set in jail for 4 months when finally the truth came out and i got cleared. this city doesnt investigate anything as long as a finger is pointed you done and all i need is someone to meet me and then make up some shit on me. IDK maybe thats afear that i will not be able to over come but im fine with that im not needing some one so bad that id risk my life and freedom for. Not in this city for sure. THANKS FOR THE INFO THO AND FOR SURE THE SUPPORT!!

It looks like you have face tattoos. I say so what? Don't know where you live but it seems like tattoos are mainstream now. Just put a smile on your face and people will see past the rough exterior to who you are now. Don't focus on the past and other people won't either. Praying you find a future that looks positive.

thank you

Scotty I agree tattoos are fashionable now!!…. No big deal.... As far as MeetUp's go you just look them up online and see what's available in your area and then show up


Don't be so hard on yourself sweetie..... People on here are talking to you and supporting you and I think that they can in RL as well if you give them the chance..... Big hug......xo

i know i just rather not fool with those meet up just yet not readyfor that had some major family problems yesterday and mentally from the past im just not ready for that yet thank you all for the support

They have meet up groups... my friend is in a hiking group. She loves it. She meets so many people. They do trips too

Couldn't afford him anyone and I cought her so may not need it not with her anymore