Healthy Relationships Support Group
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matt, my boyfriend, is home from basic training and i should be happy. and i was when he got home 2 weeks ago. im happy being with him but lately i have been feeling hopeless about our relationship. idk why. how can i love someone and be so happy but at the same time be so hopeless?? i dont get it. im thinking its b/c hes going to college soon and im still in highschool. i guess im just scared. but one thing that i worry about is me. i dont worry about him cheating on me or finding another girl and breaking up with me. i worry that i will get swept off my feet by some other guy or something. is that wierd to worry about myself? i feel bad for being like this now that he is home. i thought i was done being sad. i just talked to matt about his last nite. and now this morning i work up at 6 and cried till 7. now im up and me and matt are talking on msn about all this stuff. *sighs* why do i get this way? is it normal to feel this way? im so confused and i hate being like this. why do i do this??? i think the worst possible things and put myself in the worst scenerios. how can i change myself? or my way of thinking? why cant i just be happy? ive got great family friends and a great boyfriend. why am i sad and upset? maybe its just one of those days idk. please someone give me some advice here.
CBT is an option to add a dimension to current thinking patterns.
You may access some CBT on the internet, then find a Therapist near you to help give practical help.
Good luck.
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This subject is hard for me to write on, because I was in the same situ. in high school and messed it up horribly because of some of the same fears. Sometimes the right choice is straight in front of you, but you second guess yourself and choose the wrong path.
Taking it day by day and trying not to get caught up in the "what if" stuff i think is good advice from previous posts.
You could try catching yourself each time you get caught up in worry / fear for the future and end that thought as soon as you recognise it and replace it with a positive thought about your BF / relationship / future prospects etc..
This way atleast you are balancing out the negative with the positive and you may start to feel less despair.
You are still soo young and have soo many more experiences to come.
Don't feel guilty about day dreaming of your future - maybe you fears / fantasies (fine line huh?) about being swept of your feet by another man is your subconscious indicating that your BF is mr right now maybe not mr RIGHT. (just a thought - not a conclusion)
The thing to do if you ever did come to be in this position is to draw in your integrity and end it with your current BF BEFORE things with someone else progressed into physical romance.
But this last bit is just indulging the possibility of your "what if" not advice on how to deal with the "now"
Good luck sweety...