Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
Iv been dating my boyfriend for nearly a year now, but I'm starting to wonder if he has a drink and drugs problem. When I go over to his flat there's like 3 bottles of empty beer and and empty bottle of whiskey on the floor. But bcz i don't see him that often, it's hard to know if he's drinking that amount all the time or if his excuses of "oh iv had that all week" are genuine.
The other thing is that he smokes pot. Now he told me he only does it once a month, but now I'm starting to wonder if that was a lie bcz I really needed to see him today, as I was attacked walking home a couple weeks ago and now have PTSD. And the excuse he gave was that he couldn't bcz he didn't have enough money!
Now bearing in mind the day before he told me he bought 3 beers, and yesterday he went to see his brother. I have little doubt in my mind that they smoked something and now he won't be loving toward me or there when I need him.
He can't even send a simple caring text, or call me when he knows I'm upset.
I love this guy, but he is 39 this year and has no money, a possible addiction, and no life plan. And I don't want that. I can't stand that he has no ambition, just wants to be stuck in a dead end job.
Please help me, what should I do?
The other thing is that he smokes pot. Now he told me he only does it once a month, but now I'm starting to wonder if that was a lie bcz I really needed to see him today, as I was attacked walking home a couple weeks ago and now have PTSD. And the excuse he gave was that he couldn't bcz he didn't have enough money!
Now bearing in mind the day before he told me he bought 3 beers, and yesterday he went to see his brother. I have little doubt in my mind that they smoked something and now he won't be loving toward me or there when I need him.
He can't even send a simple caring text, or call me when he knows I'm upset.
I love this guy, but he is 39 this year and has no money, a possible addiction, and no life plan. And I don't want that. I can't stand that he has no ambition, just wants to be stuck in a dead end job.
Please help me, what should I do?
GET AWAY FROM HIM NOW.
This is not a guy who cares about you more than his addiction. You deserve better than that. Being alone is better than being in a bad relationship, ESP when dealing with PTSD. I hate to say it, but he may actually make you worse! (I grew up with a user mother and she made things a helluva lot worse for me). If you ever want to talk, I'm here for you.