So this last month or two my life has gone completely downhill. I've gotten diagnosed with a couple of mental health issues, and I'm still learning how to deal with them and I'm still not really sure how. I am on the proper medication and treatment plan. My diagnosis got discovered due to an involuntary 72 hour hold at a psych ward due to me trying to Commit suicide and totaling my car I just bought. I ended up staying in the psychiatric center for 6 days in total.. Well recently I have been wanting to actually look at my own medical history/ information instead of just letting my mom know and her keeping important things from me, Preventing me from being able to use the appropriate resources. So this time, I wanted to be in control and not let my mom see the new medical report. I was trying to get a hold on everything before I laid everything on the table. I also wanted and was starting to do research on everything. Doing that made me see that what I was diagnosed with was scary accurate. Also doing extensive research made me learn a lot more about myself like triggers, things to get me into my happy place.  

      I am positive if I would have done it any other way, it wouldn't have ran its course so smoothly. Well, I've been trying to get my relationship back with my parents but this is where I dont know what to do, I am positive I've done everything I could do. My moms very childish and has herself on her own pedestal and won't come down, not even for her youngest daughter. I'll kind of fill you in on what kind of person she is, brace yourself because this is so out there its not something I could make up. Are you ready? I don't think I could ever prepare one for this information they are about to absorb. So I haven't technically lived with my mom for a little over 6 years now. I was transient and couch surfing if I wasn't staying with a boyfriend. Which is normally what would happen because I couldn't stand being around someone so angry, so displeased with life itself. I could never make my parents happy. My mom never even paid enough attention to notice I missed 2 and a half years of high school all together. Another thing that made me upset is what she has been doing a lot to me. Was when I was at the psychiatric clinic she never paid attention to anything about me, not even asking how she could help with so many years of being  a paramedic and still being in the medical field, just because she didn't physically see an incident take place, to her automatically im a pathological liar.

She kept threatening to kick me out and I don’t doubt she will eventually. But I need help how to go about this to fix it. 

   She’s constantly talking down to me. I’ll have two jobs and my own place never asking for money and get treated worse oppossed to me not working. The location of the business can be walking distance but still too far for her. Or she thinks In fast food restaurants you can demand forty hours a week plus overtime. Which Is impossible, and just demanding things will just get your hours refused until you quit. This is another thing that just rattled my brain, she complains about me not paying my bills.. but she doesn’t let me see what I owe or doesn’t even tell me I need to pay them until she’s mad because what ever I said too her was right. She will go nights without feeding me. Also I told her about all my mental illnesses, instantly told me that i wasn't welcome anymore. So I started applying for benefits through the state and she got borderline physical saying if I don't have papers on her bed id suffer the consequences. Help