Healthy Relationships Support Group
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-Im back! Have not been for a while, kind of went into hiding. But, just have had a few thoughts on my mind and looking for opinions/advice. So my boyfriend and I are still together (I know im crazy because of the other stuff) But two weekends ago we went to new york for his families wedding, we had a great time. then as soon as we got back i seen in his phone he was texting some girl the whole time. i flipped out called her told her to stop (she didnt know abou tme) he blamed him doing it because two years ago i broke up with him and dated some other guy (i broke up wtih my boyfriend because he is extremely mean was crazy etc.) i never cheated on him nothing. so two years later ... thats what he says. so he brok ehis phone in half and said he would never do it again and was real upset. then i caught in his facebook...yeah facebook. ugh messaging his little sisters , shes a year younger than us shes 20 smal talking and he goes ... never thought id be friends with a play boy model...thenk wink face. they continued to small talk but i thought it was awful...(she poses for playboy) he always said henever cared but you knwo hwo guys are. but still...he calimed he flirted with her bc we were fighting at the time. like ok. i dont do that when we fight? so it isnt that i am jealous of her becasue of her play boy modeling....im just upset that seh can get any guy but yet she needs to find attention from my boyfriend. weve both known her for years and i feel they both stepped over the boundaries. so now i dont feel comforable with him around because now he gave her the attention that she wanted and thinks he is interested in her. and it jus tembarasses me. im still not over either of those two things...then i look in his fb and he has stuf fin it from a long time ago but we were still dating....i dont know whether or not to be upset or what. i am having a horrible insecure day about all of this and dont knwo what to do or think with it. i feel after 7 years i dont know how to let go. i fi did what he did....he would be furious. and all i ddi was take him back a week later. i feel pathetic.
So is he OK with you doing the same sort of thing- you can have a little text thing happening with guy number 2 and a facebook smiley face with guy number 3?
None of what he is doing is making you feel good and if you two are together he has no reason to be doing those things. Sorry, I hope he either sees that he is hurting you and stops, or you move on and find your happiness.
He is a very immature boy, yes boy.
I would kick him to the curb and not look back.
You have to make a decision to either leave him alone or shut up, stop complaining and deal with your decision to stay because you know how he is. He is not going to change no time soon because you enable him to behave this way.
I speak from experience. People change when they are ready and find a reason or motivation to do so, NOT when we want them to. no matter what type of relationship. Think about your transitional periods in your life and what motivated you to change.