there’s nothing more lonely than being in a relationship and feeling lonely. Eating your dinner alone in your room. Trying to have conversation with someone who barely listens. I spent s lifetime being a caretaker in my family and being a doormat and in my adult life said enough was enough. Yet here I am feeling like garbage again. I raised my twin sisters, my younger brothers, I stayed home for over a decade to raise my son with special needs and kicked ass at it. Now it is my time to shine so to speak. Im in college, doing well and recently walked past a poster hanging on the school wall for International Honor Society. There was my name. I stood starting st that for what seemed like forever. I never had anything like that was proud of myself. I read the email invitation over and over again. But here I sit sad because all I can think is how much I miss my dad who has passed on 23yrs now. He would have been proud of me. Tried to tell my mom she skipped right over the subject like it was nothing. She does that frequently. No congrats or way to go. It just makes me feel insignificant. I don’t want to tell my partner because it seems like every time I do something good or move forward a bit he fights with me to try and sabotage it. I don’t know I don’t like being a Debbie downer. Guess I just needed to vent for a minute. Thanks to anyone that was willing to listen.