Healthy Relationships Support Group

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i can read her... but she can't read me

ReedNotRed
ReedNotRed
i know the answer is probably right in front of my face, but i need to ask anyways...

This is the love of my life... the women I'm weeks from marrying, yet....

I can read her like a book... i can tell when she is sad, mad, upset, etc.

But she can never read me... she get's glimpse or brief periods when she can read me.... but mostly she can't tell. I know I should just tell her how I feel... but I don't want her to feel bad for being unable to know how I truly feel about things.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Did you meet on the psychic friends network?? *snort* sorry....

If she seems not to be on the same "Wavelength" as you are... I would just open my mouth and talk about it. Maybe you are not as easy to read as you think you are
deleted_user
deleted_user
Hello!! I just read your profile... It says you're "emotionless"... Maybe that is why she is having trouble reading you.
deleted_user
deleted_user
If you feel your emotions need to be controlled, then it is no surprise that she can't read you.

So you have to compensate in other ways like Brightside53 said ... communicate, communicate, communicate! Do it verbally, do it in writing, do it physically through touch.

Don't leave her hanging out there trying to guess what is going on inside. This is a recipe for disaster in a marriage.

Marriage is work. Love is not enough. The easy part is over when you say "I Do". If you haven't laid the proper foundation for the marriage before you walk down the aisle, you are going to have less chance for success.

If the two of you haven't done so already, you should be getting pre-marriage counseling. And take is seriously.

The two of you could also benefit from reading and discussing the following books:

His Needs, Her Needs
The Five Love Languages
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
deleted_user
deleted_user
As the other posters said, communicate! No one is a mind reader, if you want her to know your feelings, tell her what they are. Guessing games don't belong in a relationship.
Misred
Misred
MY EX thought he could read me and still thinks he can. A majority of the time he was wrong. Are you sure you can read her? My EX thought if I was quiet it meant I was mad about something. He would pester the heck out of me so sometimes I would make something up just to shut him up. I don't always have something to say and don't feel it necessary to fill the air with mindless chatter.

Good luck
deleted_user
deleted_user
I don't understand why COMMUNICATING is going to make your SO feel bad?... I'm one of those people who can easily be read as I throw all of my emotions out there, but sometimes find it hard to read others. Never would i feel bad about someone sharing their feelings with me, nor would i take it as a sign that there is something wrong with me for not knowing their each and every whim. Maybe you're the one who needs to be more expressive rather than acting like it's her issue.